Murdochs Lyrics from Songs He Can't Get Out Of His Head

When You're Evil, by Voltaire

When the Devil is too busy,
And death's a bit too much,
They call on me,
By name you see,
For my special touch.
To the gentlemen I'm Miss Fortune,
To the Ladies I'm Sir Prise,
But call me by any name,
Any way it's all the same;

I'm the fly in your soup,
I'm the pebble in your shoe,
I'm the pea beneath your bed,
I'm a bump on every head.
I'm the peel on which you slip,
I'm the pin in every hip,
I'm the thorn in your side,
Makes you wriggle and writhe!

And it's so easy when you're evil,
This is the life, you see,
The Devil tips his hat to me,
I do it all because I'm evil,
And I do it all for free!
Your tears are all the pay I'll ever need.

While there's children to make sad,
While there's candy to be had,
while there's pockets left to pick,
While there's grannies left to trip down the stairs
I'll be there, I'll be waiting 'round the corner
It's a game, I'm glad I'm in it
'Cause there's one born every minute

And it's so easy when you're evil,
This is the life, you see,
The Devil tips his hat to me,
I do it all because I'm evil,
And I do it all for free!
Your tears are all the pay I'll ever need.

I pledge my allegiance, to all things dark
And I promise on my damned soul
To do as I am told.
Lord Beelzebub has never seen
A soldier quite like me;
Not only does his job, but does it happily.

I'm the fear that keeps you awake,
I'm the shadows on the wall,
I'm the monsters they become,
I'm the nightmare in your skull.
I'm a dagger in your back,
An extra turn upon the rack,
I'm the quivering of your heart,
A stabbing pain, a sudden start!

And it's so easy when you're evil!
This is the life, you see,
The Devil tips his hat to me.
I do it all because I'm evil,
And I do it all for free;
Your tears are all the pay I'll ever need!
And I do it all for free;
Your tears are all the pay I'll ever need!
And I do it all for free;
Your tears are all the pay I'll ever need!

It gets so lonely being evil.
What I'd do to see a smile,
Even for a little while.
And no one loves you when you're evil...

I'm lying through my teeth!
Your tears are all the company I need!

Wings of a Butterfly, by HIM


Heaven ablaze in our eyes
We're standing still in time
The blood on our hands is the wine
We offer as sacrifice

Come on, and show them your love
Rip out the wings of a butterfly
For your soul, my love
Rip out the wings of a butterfly
For your soul

This endless mercy mile
We're crawling side by side
With hell freezing over in our eyes
Gods kneel before our crime

Come on lets show, them your love
Rip out the wings of a butterfly
For your soul, my love
Rip out the wings of a butterfly
For your soul
(Rip out the wings of a butterfly)
Don’t let go
(Rip out the wings of a butterfly)
For your soul

Come on, and show them your love
Rip out the wings of a butterfly
For your soul, my love
Rip out the wings of a butterfly
For your soul
(Rip out the wings of a butterfly)
Don’t let go
(Rip out the wings of a butterfly) [x2]
For your soul

Be Prepared, performed by Scar in "The Lion King". A truly brilliant "Villain Song," despite the slight monotone it is sung in. The dude stands on a mountain of evil, whilst turning a bunch of disorganised Hyenas into the fekking Third Reich!


I know that your powers of retention
Are as wet as a warthog's backside.
But thick as you are, pay attention;
My words are a matter of pride.
It's clear from your vacant expressions,
The lights are not all on upstairs.
But we're talking kings and successions
Even you can't be caught unawares!

So prepare for a chance of a lifetime,
Be prepared for sensational news;
A shining new era
Is tiptoeing nearer

[Shenzi:] And where do we feature?"

Just listen to teacher...
I know it sounds sordid,
But you'll be rewarded,
When at last I am given my dues
And injustice deliciously squared
Be prepared!

[Banzai:] Yeah, Be prepared!
[Shenzi:]Yeah-heh...we'll be prepared, heh...For what?
[Scar:] For the death of the king.
[Banzai:] Why? Is he sick?
[Scar:] No, fool-- we're going to kill him. And Simba too.
[Shenzi:] Great idea! Who needs a king?
[Shenzi (and then Banzai):]
No king! No king! la--la-la--la-laa-laa!
[Scar:] Idiots! There will be a king!
[Banzai:] Hey, but you said, uh...
[Scar:] I will be king! Stick with me, and you'll never go hungry again!

[Shenzi and Banzai:] Yaay! All right! Long live the king!
[All Hyenas:] Long live the king! Long live the king!

[Full song again]

[Hyenas: {Uniform whilst Goose-stepping}]
It's great that we'll soon be connected
With a king who'll be all-time adored!

[Scar:] Of course, quid pro quo, you're expected
To take certain duties on board
The future is littered with prizes
And though I'm the main addressee
The point that I must emphasize is
You won't get a sniff without me!
So prepare for the coup of the century
(Oooh!)
Be prepared for the murkiest scam
(Oooh... La! La! La!)
Meticulous planning
(We'll have food!)
Tenacity spanning
(Lots of food)
Decades of denial
(We repeat)
Is simply why I'll
(Endless meat)
Be king undisputed
(Aaaaaaah...)
Respected, saluted
(...aaaaaaah...)
And seen for the wonder I am
(...aaaaaaah!)
Yes, my teeth and ambitions are bared
(Oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo)
Be prepared!
[All:]
Yes, our teeth and ambitions are bared
Be prepared!

With the song "Be Prepared", not only are they goosestepping like the Nazis, but they're singing the BSA motto of Be Prepared. I find it hilarious.

It certainly is far more sinister than I originally picked up when I first watched it! I also find the fact that the guy singing whilst the fourth Reich is marching past sounds British brilliantly ironic. XD


Anyway, this is the next song:
Super Villain, by Powerman 5000

You're dressin all in black
From your front to your back
And all your evil ways
They seem to go on for days
And as a matter of fact
You got one more night before ya

Smash it up, burn it down
Tearing up the underground
You wanna live like a super villain
Back in the line up
Before your times up
You wanna live like a super villain

There's nowhere to go
There's nowhere to go

No point in saving this town
Fuck all those pricks and those clowns
I know you'd rather abuse
Condem or slightly confuse
Kick 'em all when their down
And just for fun you're gonna

Smash it up, burn it down
Tearing up the underground
You wanna live like a super villain
Back in the line up
Before your times up
You wanna live like a super villain

There's nowhere to go
There's nowhere to go
There's nowhere to go

There's nowhere to go when your on your own, you don't care about what's wrong or what is right.

Alright, alright you've been knockin down these doors, you've been filling up this room.
You're been runnin round the place like your name was Dr. Doom.
You're a killer of culture, a vulture of style, and it won't be that long before you end up on trial.

Smash it up, burn it down
Tearing up the underground
You wanna live like a super villain
Back in the line up
Before your times up
You wanna live like a super villain
Like a super villain
Like a super villain
Yeah
Like a super villain

There's nowhere to go

Like a super villain

There's nowhere to go

Like a super villain

This is "Oh No You Didn't" by the Wojhan Brothers. It was the theme to the game "Mercenaries 2".

Oh no!
Oh no!
Oh no!
Yo, yo, yo

Oh no you didn’t!
Sucka tried to play me
But you never payed me, never
Oh no you didn’t!
Pay back is a coming
You will be running forever
Oh no you did!
Till i get my vengence
I will never end this mayhem
Oh No you didn’t!
I'm a mercenary
You ain't gotta prayer you owe meeee
Oh no you didn’t!

Oh no you didn’t!
Oh no you didn’t!
Oh no you didn’t!
Oh no you didn’t!
Didn't you oh no
You didn't pay me what you owe me
So now its over for you!

papapapapapapapapapapapapapa
Yeah!
papapapapapapapapapapapapapa
Yoyo
check it out!

Oh no you didn’t!
First you tried to trap me
Then you bust a cap in my ass
Oh No you didn’t!
Such humiliation
Would bring annihilation at last
Oh no you did!
It will be delicious
When I get vicious tomorrow
Oh no you didn’t!
There’s no second chances
You will do the dance of sorrow
Oh no you didn’t!

Oh no you didn’t!
Oh no you didn’t!
Oh no you didn't!
Oh no you didn’t!
Didnt you oh no
You didnt pay me what you owe me
So now it’s over for you!

Papapapapapapapappapapa
What a fool!
Papapapapapapapapa
alright come on!

Oh no you didn’t
Better watch your back boy!
Keep running!
This aint just a game
Ill never stop coming
I got my arsenal
I put out the call
And when I finish y'all
You'll be a rag doll

Fool tried to diss me
Now your gonna wish you were dead!
Oh no you didn’t!
After I deliver
Your blood will be a river of red
Oh no you did!
Better beware
When no one’s there to defend you!
Oh no you didn’t!
So many ways to kill
Its gonna be a thrill to end youuuuu
Oh no you didn’t

Oh no you didn’t!
Oh no you didn’t!
Oh no you didn’t!
Oh no you didn’t!
Didnt you oh no
You didnt pay me what you owe me
So now it’s over for yoooooouu oooooo

Oh no!
Oh no!
Oh no!
Oh no you didn't!

This song is by "Barenaked Ladies" and you may recognise it...


Our whole universe was in a hot dense state,
Then nearly fourteen billion years ago expansion started. Wait...
The Earth began to cool,
The autotrophs began to drool,
Neanderthals developed tools,
We built a wall (we built the pyramids),
Math, science, history, unraveling the mysteries,
That all started with the big bang!

"Since the dawn of man" is really not that long,
As every galaxy was formed in less time than it takes to sing this song.
A fraction of a second and the elements were made.
The bipeds stood up straight,
The dinosaurs all met their fate,
They tried to leap but they were late
And they all died (they froze their asses off)
The oceans and pangea
See ya, wouldn't wanna be ya
Set in motion by the same big bang!

It all started with the big BANG!

It's expanding ever outward but one day
It will cause the stars to go the other way,
Collapsing ever inward, we won't be here, it wont be hurt
Our best and brightest figure that it'll make an even bigger bang!

Australopithecus would really have been sick of us
Debating out while here they're catching deer (we're catching viruses)
Religion or astronomy, Encarta, Deuteronomy
It all started with the big bang!

Music and mythology, Einstein and astrology
It all started with the big bang!
It all started with the big BANG!

This next one is from Taylor Swifts most recent album, Speak Now. I like Taylor Swift, even though her range is fairly limited, and I was singing this song for three days straight, despite my best attempts otherwise!


Story of Us, by Taylor Swift

I used to think one day we'd tell the story of us,
How we met and the sparks flew instantly;
People would say they're the lucky ones.

I used to know my spot was next to you,
Now I'm searching the room for an empty seat,
'Cause lately I don't even know what page you're on.

Oh, a simple complication,
Miscommunications lead to fallout.
So many things that I wish you knew,
So many walls up, I can't break through!

Now I'm standing alone in a crowded room
And we're not speaking,
And I'm dying to know, is it killing you
Like it's killing me?
I don't know what to say since a twist of fate,
When it all broke down,
And the story of us looks a lot like a tragedy now.

Next chapter

How'd we end up this way?
See me nervously pulling at my clothes and trying to look busy,
And you're doing your best to avoid me.

I'm starting to think one day I'll tell the story of us,
How I was losing my mind when I saw you here,
But you held your pride like you should have held me.

Oh I'm scared to see the ending,
Why are we pretending this is nothing?
I'd tell you I miss you, but I don't know how,
I've never heard silence quite this loud!

Now I'm standing alone in a crowded room,
And we're not speaking,
And I'm dying to know, is it killing you
Like it's killing me?
I don't know what to say since a twist of fate,
When it all broke down,
And the story of us looks a lot like a tragedy now.

This is looking like a contest
Of who can act like they care less,
But I liked it better when you were on my side.
The battle's in your hands now,
But I would lay my armor down
If you'd say you'd rather love then fight.

So many things that you wish I knew,
But the story of us might be ending soon.

Now I'm standing alone in a crowded room,
And we're not speaking,
And I'm dying to know, is it killing you,
Like it's killing me?
I don't know what to say since a twist of fate,
When it all broke down,
And the story of us looks a lot like a tragedy now
Now, now

And we're not speaking
And I'm dying to know, is it killing you
Like it's killing me?

And I don't know what to say since a twist of fate
'Cause we're going down
And the story of us looks a lot like a tragedy now

The end

This is "The Dirtiest Song That Ain't" by Voltaire. Now, the blanks are actually left blank by him. He just allows the audience to fill in the blanks. In the concerts, he gets the audience to shout out something that rhymes with the last line...so go ahead, ye of dirty minds, fill 'em in!


"I've been 'round for a long time
And I learned along the way:
If you wanna go on the radio
There are words you just can't say!
Well, I thought hard about it
And I found a way around it

Help me go on the radio, you gotta say the words I can't.
You got to sing along to make this song
The dirtiest song that ain't.
Come on, ma'am, won't you give me your hand
And say the words I can't?
You got to sing along to make this song
The dirtiest song that ain't

Down in Carolina
I met a girl with a nice ---!
So I reached down between us
And I whipped out my ---!
Skipped right past the suckin'
And got right down to ---!
She turned and said: 'I gotta ask,
Would you slip it into my ---?'

Help me go on the radio and say the words I can't.
You got to sing along to make this song
The dirtiest song that ain't.
Come on, ma'am, won't you give me your hand
And say the words I can't?
You got to sing along to make this song
The dirtiest song that ain't

Her husband was a trucker
He was a filthy mother---!
I didn't wanna wrastle
With this no-good stinkin' ---!
I heard him come through the kitchen door
When I was bangin' his filthy ---!
I knew I'd end up in a ditch
If he caught me ridin' his ---!

Help me go on the radio and say the words I can't.
You got to sing along to make this song
The dirtiest song that ain't.
Come on, ma'am, won't you give me your hand
And say the words I can't?
You got to sing along to make this song
The dirtiest song that ain't

"Mercy, please!" I told him,
But he grabbed me by the ---!
And he did something heinous
He exposed his ---!
I said "I don't mean to seem crass,
But why are you buttering up your ---?"
He said "My wife's a beard, and she lured you here.
'Cause I'm queer and I love it in the ---!"

Help me go on the radio by saying the words I can't.
You have to sing along to make this song
The dirtiest song that ain't.
Sir and ma'am, thanks for lending a hand.
By saying the words I can't.
You have to sing along to make this song
The dirtiest song,
The filthiest song,
The dirtiest song that ain't.

And this is House of Pain with "Top o' the mornin' to ya"

Ya see, I'm Irish, but I'm not a leprechaun
You wanna fight, then step up and we'll get it on
You gotta right to the grill, I'm white and I'm ill
A descendant of Dublin with titanic skill
I ducked and I swing, next thing your jaw's broken
Punk I ain't jokin', you can bet you'll be chokin'
On a fist full a nothin', meanwhile I'll be puffin'
On a fat blunt, run punk, you don't know the half
Tryin' to talk shit, man, please don't make me laugh
These Irish eyes are smilin', I'm buckwildin'
The House Of Pain is pumpin', start jumpin'
Freak it, funk it, back seat junk it
If you can't get with it, you'll wind up sweatin' it
Then you'll get a beatin' just like an egg
It's so hard to run when you've got a broken leg
But we can have a run off, the House Of Pain'll come off
We got the cake that you're tryin' to get a crumb off
The Irish stylee, the Celtic jazz
No one has it, just us that's it
If you try to take it, I got a big shileighly
I don't have dreads cause I shave my head daily
You call me a skin head, I call you a pin head
Yo, where you been man, just like the tin man
You got no heart, here comes the good part
I pick 'em, buck 'em, cut 'em up, and buck them down
No fuckin' around
Home boy ya get clown like Krusty, trust me
You shouldn't play, and by the way
Top o' the mornin' to ya

(What's the hassle man?) Top o' the mornin' to ya
(Hey, are you givin' us a hassle man?) Top o' the mornin' to ya [x2]

Greetin's, salutations
Peace to the nations of Zulu and Islam
Crack the bottle, rev the throttle
Put the gear in, now you're stearin'
Like Mario Antretti
So let me kick it, cause I can make a wicked
Noise like a cricket
Rubbin' his legs, my rhymes are like eggs
I'll keep layin' 'em, I'll keep sayin' 'em
This is the House Of Pain, we're far from plain
But we're not fancy, Ron and Nancy
So just say no, but I say go
Straight to hell, I kiss and tell
So if you're a ho, all my friends know
What you gotta say, let's hit the hay
And have no delay, and yo, by the way
Top o' the mornin' to ya

(What's the hassle man?) Top o' the mornin' to ya
(Hey, are you givin' us a hassle man?) Top o' the mornin' to ya [x2]

Extra extra, read all about it
How could ya doubt it?
Now scream and shout it!
The House Of Pain soon will reign
Over the hip hop scene and like golden green
I rip shit and back flip like a Jedi
I roll with the groove and I'm smooth and you can bet I
Come correct and get respect when I'm flowin'
Collectin my dough, I got you're girlfriend ho-in'
And how do I know that she's funk?
I know she's broke cause yo, the T's hung like a
Shetland pony, gettin' paid like Sony
So never ever try to play me out like a phony
Cause I can get real thick like a bull with Mark Toneil
And by the way, top o' the mornin' to ya

(What's the hassle man?) Top o' the mornin' to ya
(Hey, are you givin' us a hassle man?) Top o' the mornin' to ya [x2]

This is "Stealing Food" by Jay Foreman...I can't get it out of my head since I saw him as a warm up gig for Dave Gorman last Monday.


Stealing food, stealing food,
Stealing food, food, food,
Eating what belongs to others puts me in a good mood!
Though my friends say that I shouldn't,
There is nothing that I wouldn't steal.
Food, food, food, food, food!

I’m a veritable gastronomic kleptomaniac,
While my friends are having dinner is when I like to attack;
I say “look, what’s that behind you?” and they turn around to see,
Then I finish what they’re eating, and I say “it wasn’t me.”

Stealing food, stealing food
Stealing food, food, food
Cheefing chips and pinching pringles puts me in a good mood
Food is so much more delicious
If my friends are all suspicious!
Stealing food, food, food, food, food!!

Now, the most efficient way to satisfy your appetite
Is to eat from your friends’ cupboards in the middle of the night
But no matter if you’re tempted; you should never take the lot
Leave the packaging behind; remind them what they haven’t got.

Stealing food, stealing food
Stealing food, food, food
When I risk it for a biscuit, then I’m in a good mood
It’s the best of all decisions
Going klepto on provisions
Stealing food, food, food, food, food!!

At the local supermarket, they’ve got food on every shelf
Simply hide it in your jumper, you can take it for yourself
If the camera doesn’t see you and you’re relatively quick
You can fill yourself for days with all the things that you can nick!

Stealing food, stealing food
Stealing food, food, food
Run-awaying without paying puts me in a good mood
With my method tried and tested
I will never be arrested
Stealing food, food, food, food, food!!

On the A1(M) in Hatfield there’s a warehouse, yes that’s right!
Massive lorry-loads of food go in and out all day and night
If you’re clever with your timing and there’s ten of you at least
You’ll be driving home a lorry with a veritable feast!

Stealing food, stealing food
Stealing food, food, food
Jacking lorryloads from Sainsburys puts me in a good mood
Stealing, stealing, stealing, stealing, stealing,
Stealing, stealing, stealing, stealing
Food, food, food, food, food!!

Pinch the peanuts
Nick the nik-naks
Take the tea-bags
Burgle the beef burgers
Grab the grape juice
Rob the rice cakes
Heist the hobnobs
Volez les vols-au-vons
Lift the lurpack
Snatch the snack-a-jacks
Jack the Jaffa cakes
Pick up the penguins
Yoink the yum-yums
Swipe the sweeties
Steeeeeealing fooooood!!!!

This one is "You're gonna go far kid" by Offspring.
I believe that it's based on "Lord of The Flies"


Show me how to lie
You're getting better all the time
And turning all against the one
Is an art that's hard to teach
Another clever word
Sets off an unsuspecting herd
And as you step back into line
A mob jumps to their feet

Now dance, fucker, dance
Man, he never had a chance
And no one even knew
It was really only you

And now you steal away
Take him out today
Nice work you did
You're gonna go far, kid

With a thousand lies
And a good disguise
Hit 'em right between the eyes
Hit 'em right between the eyes
When you walk away
Nothing more to say
See the lightning in your eyes
See 'em running for their lives

Slowly out of line
And drifting closer in your sights
So play it out I'm wide awake
It's a scene about me
There's something in your way
And now someone is gonna pay
And if you can't get what you want
Well it's all because of me

Now dance, fucker, dance
Man, I never had a chance
And no one even knew
It was really only you

And now you'll lead the way
Show the light of day
Nice work you did
You're gonna go far, kid
Trust, deceived!

With a thousand lies
And a good disguise
Hit 'em right between the eyes
Hit 'em right between the eyes
When you walk away
Nothing more to say
See the lightning in your eyes
See 'em running for their lives

Now dance, fucker, dance
He never had a chance
And no one even knew
It was really only you

So dance, fucker, dance
I never had a chance
It was really only you

With a thousand lies
And a good disguise
Hit 'em right between the eyes
Hit 'em right between the eyes
When you walk away
Nothing more to say
See the lightning in your eyes
See 'em running for their lives

Clever alibis
Lord of the flies
Hit 'em right between the eyes
Hit 'em right between the eyes
When you walk away
Nothing more to say
See the lightning in your eyes
See 'em running for their lives