Murdochs Epic Poetry Post :)

Ok, Guys. Posting some of my poetry here. Starting from the beginning, tell me if you want more

JUDGEMENT

Bathed in brilliant light, so
completely naked, exposed before
the eyes of hundreds. being judged,
weighed,

measured.
do any of them know the real me? do any of them
even care? or do they, with their fiendish minds
seek to destroy what i have taken great care to build? my castle,

my armour, my shield. all gone, all useless,
before the judging of my peers. i ask myself
do i even care? what do they know about me,
to judge me so? do they know my thoughts, my

feelings? no.
they do not, and for that reason,
I turn, and walk off the stage,
that is the pedestal of my life. the curtains close,

the ultimate barrier between me
and my fellow men.

Dude! This is totally epic! I love it!

So many people would agree with you here!

That's like awesomely good man.

KUDOS!

Thank you I'll try to write more tonight.

u better

Here's a new one

INCOMPARABLE

How do I describe something
That is indescribable?
How do I compare something to something
That is incomparable?

I could describe the day,
The way the noon-time sun shone, bright and warm
On that summers day. The sweet, warm scent
Of summer air, the feel of the cool grass in my fingers,

And the warmth of mid-summer. I could not compare you
To all these things, it wouldn’t be fair.
These things are nothing
Compared to you. The way your hair shines brighter than the sun itself,

The scent of it, resting on my shoulder.
The way your body feels, so warm, so
Close to mine. I cannot help but wonder-
Does the sun itself look down in envy, that it cannot shine as much as you?

Does the moon watch in anger, that it cannot enchant me
Half as much as you? Do other couples
Look at us and glare
At how we lie together, laughing together, without a care in the world?

I wonder, then realize
I don’t care.
All that matters is you. I couldn’t compare you
To anything-not the clear, blue lakes of scotland, that are

Dirty and polluted, next to your eyes.
not the beautiful Countryside of france, ugly and malformed
compared to your face.
Not the winter wonderlands of fairy tales, so black and disgusting

Next to your pure, beautiful skin,
Nor the exuisite rainforests of south america, which cannot
Captivate me as much as your long, silky hair.
Your voice,

Your laugh,
Ring truer to me than the clearest of bells.
Your voice,
Your laugh,

More lovely than the greatest sonnet.
Do swans gaze in sorrow,
At your divine grace? You are truly an angel,
And I wonder,

What have I, a mere mortal, done
To deserve such a miracle?
What the Lord giveth, the Lord taketh away,
But I am not scared. I had never truly lived,

Until I met you. And I would give you up
Without remorse, for all things must end, sooner
Or later, and I am fortunate to have you now, so close,
And I thank the Lord for whatever short time

He has given me with his most perfect creation.
Even this poem
Does you no justice, and I apologize.
For how can I describe something

That is indescribable? The answer-
I can’t. so I won’t even try.

Sorry... I have to pick my jaw up off the floor.

That is also amazing! Your special girl is so lucky to have you!
=)

Haha...well, I appreciate the sentiment, but I am sorry to say that, at this point in time- and indeed, most of my life so far- I have not had "another half". I think I've kissed a girl...once. Sad, but you know...either I'll find someone, or I won't. I have a lot of problems, and I think the first challenge would be finding a girl who can put up with me long enough to like me like that, lol.

To be honest, this poem was more...well, its more like an idealogical poem. The sort of thing I would want to have, if I had it at all. I wouldn't want to be these couples that argue and fight and stay together because they feel they have to. I would want to stay together because we want to.

But hey. What happens happens, what doesn't doesn't. I am glad you like the poem, though Another one tomorrow, hopefully. I am sorry if I stall for a few days; it can be hard thinking up poems.

Mumu a romantic at heart *nods*

Not a word of this to anyone outside this site. Roight?

Oh sure
Tell that to the Advertizer

What do you mean?

See my name tittle?

Yeah, Moderator. What does that have to do with you not mentioning my little issue outside of this website?

Not that!
lookfurther down

Ah, the Advertiser. Well, just don't. I'm trusting you guys

PRISONER

This face you see, my face,
Is a lie. My life, as you see it,
Is a lie. You think you know me,
But no one does. You see laughter, jokes, happiness.

But it’s a lie. Behind the eyes, which are laughing with you,
is pain
Pain at what people say, what people do to me
How they laugh,

Shove,
Isolate.
This mask I wear, the face you see,
Is a lie.

This costume I don, this suit I wear,
Is a lie.
I laugh off your comments, but did you know
That I cry myself to sleep each night?

You think me heartless, inconsiderate
But I try. I try to let me-the real me-come out,
Sometimes, like some perverse phantom
of the opera. Haunting

The shadows, creeping
Through the rafters, but you just give me a hard stare,
A sharp word. To shut up, and stop acting.
I am bleeding, did you know that? A thousand cuts

For a thousand words, a thousand hurts.
I erected barriers, but you rip them down,
Make me fear emerging
From behind the mask, showing my true face.

I cannot be myself.
My castle, my guards, my armour.
My prison, my wardens, my shackles.
I cannot get out, I cannot escape.

I’m a prisoner of my own protection.

Deep
So true
I feel ya man

Lol, Thank You. I know it sounds pitiful, but this is how I feel sometimes. I won't bore you with the whole story, but that is basically me on a bad day. Eh, I'm a teenager. I think I'm allowed some hormonal, depressed days.

It's ok
its normal for those who deep down emotionally sensitive.

Lol...

Ok, my next one. This covers a very sensitive subject, one that I am thankful that I have not had to deal with. I know one of my friends had to deal with it once, though.
This poem does not reflect personal experience, and takes a slightly different stance then my usual attitude.
This poem is split into four sections.

DRIPPING

1. Beginning

It was a Sunday,
I found myself sitting, staring
Into space outside my house,
Waiting for someone,
That never came.

The wind whispered
Evil thoughts,
I ignored it.
The bushes snickered,
I ignored them.

I thought
What could it be,
Where could she be,
What could have happened?
Thoughts arrived, unbidden, unwanted.
I tried to ignore them.

A ringing, a piercing shrill note of despair
And hope. I stopped it, listened
Tried to tell them it was a mistake,
It couldn’t be true no can’t be no it isn’t
Must be some mistake.

Of course it wasn’t. She wasn’t coming.
Ever.


2. Aftermath

The ceremony was long,
Dark,
Depressing. All I loved was taken
Away by a careless driver.

A poisoned man, a deluded man, a man
Frequently down the pub,
Had taken from me the one thing that mattered most
In my life.
No parent to comfort, no friends to talk to, not really,

Completely alone in my shell.
On the drive home, quiet. The man beside me,
Focusing on something, not the road. Opens his mouth
As if to speak. Shuts it again, can’t blame him.
The silence is deafening, but noise is worse.

At school, silent stares
And hushed whisperings, attempted sympathy,
I don’t need it. I don’t need it’s ok
She’s in a better place you’ll see her again don’t cry
Don’t cry don’t cry.

Don’t cry. See her again. Better place.
I need her back.
Can you get her back?
Can you get her back?
Don’t worry? Cheer up?

My ass.


3. Drip.

Drip
Drip
Drip
Drip

The sound is pleasant.
Hypnotic.
Soothing.
Relieving.

All it took was a sharp stab
Of pain, then it felt
Good.
Not the first time, not the last,

Locked door, sink beside me,
Sitting on the bath side,
Thinking. I could end it,
Right now, but I don’t want to.

Drip
Drip
Like a metronome. Increase the speed,
Decrease the time

Long sleeved jumper rolled up arms,
Roll them down when I leave.
Its cold out, winter,
At least for me.

Almost time to stop, I hear a sound
A running, pounding of feet,
Up the stairs, I shrug.
Locked door, privacy.

Man bursts in, looking desperate,
Maybe for the toilet?
Obviously didn’t lock door,
My mistake.

Man stops, looks at me. Looks at sink,
At bath.
Drip
Drip

Man screams. Wrenches tool away from me.
Asks me why why why? All I think
Is where was he,
When She died?

4. End.

Stares at school louder then before
Silence is stretching
Tools locked away
Relief denied me.

Sitting in a chair
Man sitting across from me
With clipboard and pen
With glasses and wispy hair.

How does that make you feel he asks
How do you think?
Tell me about your dreams
No dreams are full of
Monsters and drivers

Need to stop relief
Why should I
Helps me
Love the feeling

Love the sound
Drip drip drip
Gives me peace
Can’t you accept that?

Obviously not
Gives me prescriptions
Gives me treatment
That I don’t need

Man drives sitting next to me
Opens his mouth to speak
Shuts it again
Why can’t he ever talk?

Standing on a chair
In the air
Coarse around my neck
Slightly uncomfortable

Can’t take the stares
Can’t take the whispers
Can’t take the treatment
Can’t take the sympathy

One step
One jump
Better place You’ll see her again soon
Damn right I will.

Check the coarseness
Check the support
Check everything
Here goes.

I had a friend who died bcuz of a drunk guy...
That poem.
Really deep and good

K, it looks like I've lost readers
Oh well...I wanted some feedback on that last one; it is about a very sensitive subject, and I wanted to know if I did a good job. I haven't contemplated it before, so I wouldn't know the thought processes.
Oh well, here's another one for whatever readers I do have


UNOBTAINABLE

I watch from a distance
Even though its only a few feet.
I see you from afar,
But talk to you from so near.
I see as you get hurt,

From words, actions,
Memories. You know how I feel
About you, but I don’t
Know your feelings for me.
Hate?

Love?
Indifference?
No matter. You’re too good
For the likes of me.
You, beautiful

Smart
Funny.
Me, ugly
Stupid
Arrogant, and patronizing.

I make an effort, but
Always end up saying the wrong things.
I wish I could tell you,
Without fear or consequences,
That I think you beautious, that

Your grace shames even Angels.
That I think you incomparable.
But there is no such thing
As actions without consequence,
And I am a coward. I wish

I could be like you-brave.
So I could tell you these things,
But I’m not. So I continue
To watch you from a distance,
To see you from afar.

For me, you are unobtainable,
And I must live with that.
You will always be

My greatest ‘what if’.

Hum. Looks like I no longer have readers...

great poems mate look forward to reading more

Lol, at least that's one.