I chose... Rapture. [Faith/ Dream]

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Welcome to Rapture. A city where the artist can roam freely, the scientist can create with the sky as the limit, and the power is with the people. Such a place could never exist on land therefore it was literally built on the bottom of the ocean, as far away from the governing powers as possible. Out of every jurisdiction. The extreme of extremes. It is a massive place with buildings that tower over head and long walkways that link different areas of the city together.
Everything you could ever want you can find in Rapture. There are stores, restaurants, hotels, spas, housing units, art galleries, markets, sports centers and for those who enjoy a little bit of nighttime excitement there are bars and love-houses. Everyone is welcome in Rapture! There are no minorities. Everyone is equal. Everyone gets a fair share.
All of this is thanks to to the hard work and dedication of our founder Andrew Ryan!

At least..that's how things used to be. Before the revolution. On New Year's Eve, at 12:00 on the dot, just as the clocks were ticking down and the champagne bottles were about to be popped, explosions rang through the entire city. The whole foundation of Rapture was shaken to its very core. Those explosions marked the beginning of what would be a long battle throughout the streets between those who supported Andrew Ryan and those who supported a man named Frank Fontaine. Soon blood coated every wall on every corner of the city. The year 1959 was off to a great start.

Hundreds died and those that didn't die..were left to slowly go insane. Driven only further to insanity by their addiction to Adam; the genetical stimulant that once kept the wheels of Rapture turning.
The side-effect of this drug was both an overwhelming addiction to it and a range of horrible disfigurations due to the way the drug affected the human body. Those addicted where named Splicers and those Splicers are all that are left in this city. They do whatever they can to get their hands on Adam..even if it means killing each other. Many have banded together in order to overpower those who are weak, making them even more dangerous.

The revolution was two years ago. There are now those who are merely trying to get by and those who are trying to escape. But to escape means going through hell and back again...straight through the center of the city. Can you make it out?
Let's see, shall we?

She is very happy to see me awake. It seems that she’s happy that I’ve finally slept enough. The frown that had formed on my lips slowly faded away. She was so giddy to see me. It seemed that it brightened her morning to see that I was up. I didn’t know why. I couldn’t have been that important awake rather than asleep. I wasn’t much of a conversational type. What was there to talk about? Really, you could say that there were millions of things to talk about, but I wasn’t one to find those things. I liked to keep my silence and listen.

I can’t help but smile at her good morning and her telling me that she slept well. That’s really all I could hope for right now. I just wanted her to sleep well. Then she says that she got restless and she went into the city. My smile drops completely. She was out in the city after taking a hit like she did the other day. I start shaking my head. Was she stupid? I hated to say that about her, but any Splicer could be sitting in any of the buildings waiting on her. I didn’t want to sleep anymore. I didn’t want to sleep ever if it meant that she was going to sneak out on me like that.

"You shouldn't have gone out. I don't want you getting hurt again you know" I stop though, looking at her with a slight frown. It takes me a moment to realize what she had been saying.I tilt my head as I realize that she brought back something. What could she have found that she thought would be great to bring back? I watch her silently, looking at the parcel as she holds it over to me. I can’t help but smile. She was thinking of me? I wanted to rip it open like it was a Christmas present, but I knew that I should take my time. I didn’t want to seem like I was too eager for my present. I was grateful, yet, but I wasn’t going to act like I loved getting things. I wasn’t a materialistic type like most people down here were. Growing up without anything just made you that way.

I pull lightly on the bow, tugging until it slowly comes unraveled. I let the twine fall from my hands as I unwrap the paper, one little bit at a time. What meets my eyes makes me take in a sharp breath. I look up at her, almost waiting for her to say it was a joke or something. I set the parcel down in my lap, pulling up the white of the blouse. I look it over a moment, feeling my cheeks start to redden. It was nice. It was something that you bought in one of the fancy department stores that they had in the city. Then, I notice the green beneath and I set the blouse aside. I smile pulling on the green fabric so I could see the design. I can’t keep a giggle off my lips as I look at the dress. It was beautiful.

I pull the fabric to me, pressing it to my chest for a moment. Then I set it down in the paper beside me, pushing myself off the bed and onto hers, pulling my arms around her neck in a makeshift hug. My body wasn’t really ready for such a movement, and my side protests, but I just ignore it.

“I love it” I giggle quietly, pressing myself into the side of her neck.

(Sorry it’s short, but I’ve got people yelling for dinner. I’ll be back soon, but I’m not sure yet. Depends on what I’m cooking.
I didn’t want the negative vote to stay there since it was my stupidity that made it. She hasn’t messaged me back, but I’ll fix it as soon as I can!)

As much as I wanted to lie to myself and say that I had gone out for another reason other than to get her a new dress so that I wouldn't feel so guilty about having made such a stupid choice, there was simply no other reason I could think of. Sure the fresh air had been good for me but that was not the real reason behind my leaving.
The moment I told her about my having left the facility Mira began to scold me but the moment I mentioned the fact that I had brought her back something she frowned at me more curiously than angrily. When I presented her with the gift her face lit up with what looked like a suppressed version of the smile that truly wanted to shine through.

I could hardly contain my excitement as she started to unwrap her gift so carefully I thought she was trying to make fun of me. I knew better than to actually think that though so I just sat there biting the inside of my cheek anxiously. I was excited to see what she thought of the dress I had gone out of my way to find for her. Of course my choice had been somewhat limited after the amount of looting that must have gone on in this area of Rapture, an area filled with stores of all kinds, but amazingly I had stumbled upon the dress by accident.
It had been on a mannequin that was discarded in the corner by whoever had ransacked the store. A little bit of dusting and folding later, I had the perfect dress for the woman who I now knew I..loved.
Loved? Definitely loved.

The moment she set eyes upon the blouse she regarded it with both amazement and happiness. The blouse itself was somewhat plain but the material itself was soft and the stitching intricate which was what made it such a good find.
Then her gaze fell upon the dress underneath and a smile came to her lips the likes of which I had not seen before. Perhaps it was the combination of the smile along with the fact that her cheeks were burning the same shade of pink that mine were, only it was much less apparent on her compared to me.
She giggled that cute giggle that made my heart skip a beat before holding the dress up to her chest to make sure it fit her. Sure enough the size was just about perfect.

Much to my surprise she set the dress down next to her before pulling herself from her bed onto mine. I uttered a small gasp of protest, mainly because I didn't want her exerting herself so much with her body in such a state. However that protest was cut short when she wrapped her arms around my neck and hugged me to her gently, only gently because her body was still healing.
It was more than enough for me and I carefully brought one of my arms to wrap around her good side while my other hand came to rest on her waist just below her injury, careful not to apply any pressure to the area round the wound.
Her voice was soft in my ear as she whispered to me and then I felt her face press into the curve of my neck. This action caused my cheeks to turn an even deeper shade of red but I couldn't help but smile.

"I'm glad you like it, Mira." I whispered back to her quietly while leaning my head against hers just slightly. I was careful not to draw her any closer than her body allowed her to be and even though every ounce of my being wanted to hold her close and tight, I knew that would not be good for either of us.
"I'm not exactly sure what we are..but I promised myself I was going to do whatever I could to make you happy. I hope this is a good start." I added while the color on my cheeks started to fade. I realized that what I was doing was not embarrassing. I was just doing what a good friend or..partner would do for the other person in the relationship.
Which was the main question that now filled my mind. What were we? What kind of relationship did we have and how did it affect things?

(I'm sorry for the wait. Making fresh pasta without a rolling machine is a lot harder than I predicted it would be. Dinner took me a while to make haha.
It's really nothing to worry about but I suppose it couldn't hurt.. maybe she'll tell you what the heck they're there for)

I couldn’t keep the warmth of my cheeks from burning into her neck. It wasn’t an embarrassed flush really, but one I got simply because I wasn’t sure what would happen now that I had pressed myself to her. I wait for that moment that she pushes me away or scolds me for being so close, but it never comes.

I did have to say that I liked the reaction I got. She pulls her hands lightly around me, making sure not to press onto my wound. She’s very careful with me. If I had been able to, I would have pulled her closer, taking in her warmth. At this point I couldn’t. I had rested, but I wasn’t feeling exactly one hundred percent.

She seems very happy that I like it. Maybe there was a debate whether or not I would. I didn’t know since I wasn’t particularly in her head, but I hoped that she hadn’t thought that. I loved the simple fact that I got a present. The dress being one of the best things ever just added onto my happiness.

Since religion was a great big no-no in Rapture, we weren’t allowed Christmas really. Besides, if we had been able to have it, my family wouldn’t have been able to afford much of one anyway. My birthdays always came with a cake from mom and a ‘oh it’s your birthday? What are you, Eighteen?’ from dad. So anything more than a cake was really out of the question. Of course, on Valentine’s Day I would get small trinkets and candies from the smaller kids that I protected in the Drop. It wasn’t much and I was pretty sure that it was stolen. That didn’t matter though. They thought about it and I was happy to simply get something.

It takes me a little bit to realize that I probably should be pulling myself off of her. I had lost track of my thoughts so I had just been sort of sitting there, smiling quietly and happily to myself as I looked at the dress that still sat on my bed.

“It’s a great start, Echo. You just being here is a great start to…us” As I talk, I feel my voice begin to dwindle down. I wasn’t sure if ‘us’ was the right word to use. I didn’t know what she thought ‘us’ was. Were we partners still or something more? I wanted to say that we were much more at this point, but I wasn’t sure how she felt. Had yesterday all just been in the heat of the moment? She must have felt something if she went out to find me such a beautiful dress. I sigh quietly, pulling myself away from her to grab the clothing in my arms. “It’s just great” I whisper the words quietly, more to myself than to her. I loved it. I could not deny that this was the best present I had ever received.

(She told me that she couldn’t do anything about it because it wasn’t a real voting system. I put a few positive votes on your posts so it’ll sort of even it out.
Sorry for the short replies. I have to watch my sister and one of her friends so they don’t accidentally kill themselves or something. I might be slow at responding tonight.)

Mira was more pleased with her gift than I ever could have guessed she was going to be. I was so hesitant when picking it up, I imagined she was going to either like it or she was going to take it simply because it was the only thing being offered to her. However judging by the reaction I got she truly did appreciate and love the dress. There was nothing but sincerity in her voice whenever she spoke and the way she hugged me..I knew that she was truly happy with my present.
I wondered, only briefly, how it had been since the last time she received a gift from anyone but the thought quickly passed on. Perhaps I would ask her later? I was curious to find out about this.

Minutes passed and we just sat there on my bed holding one another. Perhaps not as closely and affectionately as we would have wanted to but there were limiting physical factors for each of us so we both seemed happy enough the way we were.
I could have sat there all day just feeling her warmth against me, her breath brushing against my neck, her presence reminding me that I wasn't alone anymore..but I knew that she was going to need to lay back down soon enough and that I should probably do the same. Rest had done us good but neither of us was fully healed.
Her voice flowed from its place in the crook of my neck and I blinked.

"Us.." I breathed with a look of excitement, relief, and a little bit of surprise all at the same time. Mira really used the word 'us' to describe the relation we had! Not that I expected her to feel the same about me as I felt about her.
After all I was young and therefore I was more likely to follow my emotions whether for better or for worse. Not to mention the fact that all of these emotions were new to me so I wasn't quite sure how to make sense of the way I felt about her.
All these things considered though I knew more or less that my feelings corresponded with not only the descriptions in my books but also the description she had given me two nights ago. Near word for word with both.

I was a little bit sad when she finally did pull away from me and I had to actively stop myself from breathing a reluctant sigh. I was in no place to ask her to keep close to me the way I wanted her to be, especially not with the injuries she had.
If anything I was the one who was supposed to be taking care of her. My main injuries were on my leg and arm as opposed to her injuries that were on her side and face. Of the two of us I was more fit to be sitting up and moving around.
"Does 'us' mean that there's more than just friendship between us?" I asked her quietly as I placed my hands together in my lap, wishing silently that I could reach over and take her hand instead.
I wanted to know what she thought though. I wanted to know what she wanted this 'us' to mean.
"Yesterday I let my emotions take over.. I hope I didn't scare you or-or surprise you or anything.." I added with a gentle apologetic smile.


( Aw, well thanks a lot for really trying to right the little mistake though it never really mattered I'm sure.
And that's alright! If anything once they go to bed it'll calm down no? That is unless they'll have worn you out by then)

“Happiness is the only thing that I feel whenever he is near me. He is the wing of my happiness. Without him, my life would never be the same. I can never let him go. People can call me selfish, but without him my only wing of happiness will gone.” I could still feel the warmth of her as I sat in her lap. I was so young then, so naïve.
“But what about when Daddy makes you cry Mommy? Crying isn’t happy! Crying is sad….that’s the opposite.” I leaned into her, wanting to know why daddy would make her cry. What had she done to deserve him yelling at her?
“Oh, Daddy doesn’t mean that, Mira. He’s just had a bad day at work is all. He still loves me and I still love you. Sometime, he just wants to dance with me. It makes me so happy I cry, you see?” She pulled a bit of hair out of my face, straightening the little dress I had on. I couldn’t have been older than nine or ten, but I was a very sheltered kid back then.
“I’ve never seen a dance where you get pushed, Mommy. And-And daddy doesn’t dance with me. He pushes me, kicks me. He’s a bad dancer” I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes. They slowly started to fall down my cheeks. Mommy looked at me with worried eyes, trying to get the tears away.
“Mira…Honey…Does your daddy push you and hurt you when I’m not around?” She watches me in silence and I can do nothing but nod my head slowly. I watch as her soft features turn to something else. She places a kiss on my forehead and pulls me off her lap. I stand there, looking at her beautiful face as she goes to wipe the warm salty tears off my cheeks.
“Mira, go in your room, shut the door, and play. Don’t come out no matter what you hear okay?” She smiles to me, giving me another kiss on the forehead.
“Goodbye Mommy, I love you.” The words were sweet as the crossed my lips.
“I love you too honey” Her voice is only a whisper as I turn and skip to my room.
I didn’t remember the playing I did in my room that night. I remembered the crying and the screaming and the yelling I could hear outside my door. Then, I remembered how daddy hurt me in front of mommy, just to prove a point. That was the first time he made me bleed. He was drunk, so back then I said that I didn't blame him. Mommy slept in my room with me that night. I had nightmares.
Mommy never called him her wing of happiness after that.

My eyes pull open quietly. I had pulled the dress close to me, just to lean myself against her again. I could hear her, but something caused me to think of that old memory. Maybe it was the warmth that she had. The feeling of complete and utter safety that I got when I sat in my mother’s lap. I was much different then back then. I feel my head turn to look at her a moment. I was glad that I hadn’t started crying in the middle of my daydream. I didn’t want to have to explain why I was crying.

I could tell by the way her neck and shoulders were flexing she was waiting for an answer. I still wasn’t exactly sure what she wanted me to answer. When she explained that her emotions took over…did that mean that there was nothing and she was only letting me be this close because she felt bad for me? I shake my head lightly, pulling myself away to look at her.

“You’re a kid, Echo. I hate to say it, but there’s years between us. I-I don’t think that you’ve ever felt like this about anyone. I don’t want to take advantage of something you’re not sure what it is…I-I want you to be sure what you’re feeling. I want you to decide what we are…” I could feel my cheeks flush an even deeper shade of pink. I had never had to talk about my emotions so openly before. It was just not something that I did on a regular basis. I watch her a moment before leaning in and pushing my lips to hers for a moment before pulling away before she could push me. “Do you want that for us?” I could feel my cheeks continue to morph into a darker color. If that wasn’t what she wanted between us then I had just made a very big mistake. I sigh quietly, pulling my hands up to rub my temples. Hell, I was acting like a teenager again.


(I am super sorry about yesterday. By the time I had gotten the two devils in bed I had already been forced to play make up salon, hair salon, and chase them around whenever they felt like running around like idiots. It was three in the morning by that point and I just wanted to shower and go to bed. I meant to post, but I fell asleep before AMX would load on my phone.)

As I sat there quietly waiting for an answer from Mira I could not help but notice that her eyes seemed to glaze over. She was looking away from me towards the wall but there did not seem to be any sight in her gaze. Like she was not fully aware of what she was looking at. I blinked a few times before only a slight frown came to my lips. It was more than apparent that her mind was focused on something else at that very moment.
I watched her eyes closely in an attempt to figure out whether her memories were good ones or bad ones. It was hard to tell without her consciously reacting to whatever it was going on in her head. I saw a mixture of emotions both happy and sad.
The beginning was more happy than sad but the transition to almost complete sadness was abrupt and made me blink to make sure I was not imagining things.
Whatever she was imagining it was not a good thing. I even began to wonder whether my question had been the cause of this day-dream.

At some point during her day-dream she leaned towards me gently until our bodies were touching. I was not sure whether she did this on purpose but I was more than happy to accept the touch and take as much weight as she was willing to lean against me with.
A minute or two passed before her eyes opened fully from their dazed state. I watched as she came back into the room with me from whatever memory had taken over her mind. Despite her daze she looked to be thinking of an answer to my question. Almost immediately she leaned away from me and I caught myself almost sighing at the loss of warmth, my eyes following her as she looked up at me.

At the beginning of her words I found my heart immediately began to drop into the pit of my stomach. The way she spoke made it sound as if she was going to turn down my feelings and tell me that she did not want anything to happen between us. That this 'us' was going to remain a bond of friendship and nothing more. Just the thought of her not returning my feelings was a little bit hard for me to grasp yet at the same time I expected nothing less. Who could develop feelings for a creature like me? A Big Sister. That's all I really was and ever was going to be.
I had all but lost hope when she suddenly turned the choice to me, telling me that she wanted me to decide on what the 'us' meant.

I blinked at the sudden change in her message only to find a second later that Mira's lips were pressed against mine. At first I was just surprised but then my mind was taken in by the softness of her lips and my whole body felt like it was melting. When she drew herself away I had to fight the urge to reach out, grab her by the front of the dress, and pull her right back.
I managed though and slowly I opened my eyes to look at her as her words reached my dazed mind.
I blinked once or twice before I glanced down at my hands with a light blush on my cheeks.
One of my hands slipped up to press against my chest just above where my heart was beating about a hundred times a second. Exactly like in my books.

"All I've ever wanted is to know what it's like to be normal. To not have these amazing powers, to not have to wear armor, to not have to fight my constant hunger.." I trailed off there and shook my head slightly. That was not something I wanted to think about now.
"I've always imagined what it was like to fall in love but the reality is so much different from what I've read in books. It's so much more.. amazing." I turned my head to look at the woman next to me, searching her face for a second before I reached out with the hand that had been pressed over my racing heart.
My fingers brushed against her cheek, turning her head towards me, and I leaned in to press my forehead against hers.
"I want that more than anything in this world, Mira." I finally whispered with a smile before I leaned forward to brush my lips against hers in the same way she had done to me only moments before.

(Oh it's fine really! When 12:30 came around I was so tired I assumed that the two kids had tired you out as well. I more or less passed out which worked out!)

I ignored the frown that had appeared on her face as I pulled myself out of my mind. I assumed that it was just another worry frown. I had probably been thinking for a good few minutes which left the room in silence. Maybe she was worried that it was taking me this long to formulate an answer to her question. That or she could see that I had been lost in darker thoughts. The frown that pulled on her face now though I could not ignore. It was a frown of complete loss. Could she not believe what I was saying?

She was shocked that I had kissed her as well. I wasn’t particularly sure if it was good shock or bad shock yet. She sat there for a moment, looking at me with a look that was very hard to decipher. I watched as she looked down to her hands a moment before placing her hands on her heart. I watch her a moment, wanting to reach out to see what she was doing. Was her heart being at the same pace that mine was?

As she begins to speak, I tilt my head. She was quite normal to me. Yes, I could see what she was saying. She was a Sister in her eyes still. Maybe she had thought that would change the way I thought? As she trails of, I look up to her, curiosity in my eyes. She was hungry? What kind of hunger was this that she had? I wanted to ask, but the way she stopped made me feel like she didn’t want to tell me. I would have to get some rations out of my bag later, to make sure that she wasn’t that kind of hungry. If she wasn’t that kind of hungry, then what was she?

I watch her quietly as she continues, forcing myself to drop the curious thoughts that were now feeding through my mind. Now, I looked at her, watching as she kept her hand on her heart. She said that falling in love was better than she had imagined. I can’t help a small smile pull across my lips in agreement. Really, it was far better than what I had ever thought it had been. I had given up on love long before the civil war ended. I had thought that it wasn’t for me and that there was no one out there I could share anything with that wouldn’t stab me in the back.

She pulls her hand away from her chest, drawing it lightly across my cheek. I can’t help the shivers that pull up my spine. Her touch had started doing that to me lately. She pulled me close to her, letting our foreheads come to touch. I closed my eyes a moment, just listening to her words and soaking them in. I feel her lips on mine, causing me to open my eyes. So this was actually happening, huh? I had found someone that I could share things with. I had found someone I could trust. I can’t keep the feeling inside of me away for long, and I pull a hand around her waist, pulling her closer to me. I don’t want to let her go, ever. I want the warmth and the comfort forever.

I pull away quietly, letting my forehead come to rest on hers again. A smile pulls across my lips and I can’t help the giggle that crosses my lips. I try to keep it back, but come out, slightly choked, but happy. I smile at her, leaning in to give her a hug.

“I…I love you, Echo” I whisper the words in her ear. I had never thought I would say those words to anyone besides my mother. It was unlike me to show so much affection towards someone. It was unlike me to get close. I had let this girl get close to me and she became the only thing that mattered. I knew that once we got to the surface, everything would just be that much better.

I pull away from her by orders of the pain shooting through my side. I had leaned too far over without being healed yet. I smile at her through the pain before shifting myself off the bed.
“Why don’t I go change, huh?” I smile to her, pulling myself away from her warmth and to the other side of my bed, where my backpack still sat.

(Ugh I got caught in the middle of my reply and I'm being dragged to the store. I'll be back as soon as I possibly can be, okay? Sorry about this.)

Mira seemed surprised when I kissed her but that surprised quickly passed and it was replaced by loving affection. She returned the kiss while placing her arms around my waist, drawing me closer to her until our bodies were gently pressed together. I would have worried about her side causing her pain but my mind was simply too taken away by the kiss to worry. I knew that if the pain grew too great, she would pull away of her own accord so why not enjoy the touch while I could?
Soon enough though she pulled away and I allowed her to reluctantly, enjoying quite thoroughly the tingle her lips left on mine.
The whisper that flowed into my ear next though caused my heart to skip a few beats. Mira had uttered the three words I never thought I was going to hear in my entire life. Especially not from her judging by the way we had come to meet.

At first I was unable to reply out of pure surprise and happiness but after a few seconds I found my voice again and I closed my eyes tightly, unable to believe the next words were going to pass my lips.
"I love you too, Mira." I whispered back with the same level of emotion she had whispered to me with.
The words were like satin on the tongue and just pronouncing them felt..right. Like everything in the universe, just for a few seconds, had righted itself so that we could have our moment of bliss together. The moment when we confessed our love for one another.
Sadly her side caused her to pull away and I opened my eyes to watch as she stood up from the bed, telling me she was going to get changed.

"I can't wait to see that dress on you." I purred happily while looking up at her through what was most probably a daze of happiness. That's truly what it was too. It was just the purest form of happiness that a person could feel. The knowledge that the person you had feelings for shared those feelings for you too..it was incredible.
All my life I had never imagined I would be one to find love but now that I had, there was no going back. Who better to fall in love with than the woman who was coming with me to the surface? If anything this new relationship gave me even more determination. I wanted to get to the surface so that we could both live a perfect life..together.

I watched as Mira disappeared into the hallway to change into her new dress before turning my gaze towards my hands that had found their way into my lap once again. Now that I was alone I could really feel all the different places that were still buzzing from the kiss as well as the revelation from my companion.
My heart raced in my chest, my stomach felt like it was doing somersaults, and my head could hardly settle upon a single thought without it immediately going back to the woman who had just left the room. The smile on my lips also refused to leave though that was not something I was going to complain about.
I heard movement at the door and I looked up expecting to see Mira in her new dress but instead I was met with Focus. She glanced around the room as if to make sure that I was alone before she came in, sitting down next to me on my bed.

"Hey Focus" I greeted her dreamily to which she nodded her head slightly, glancing down only briefly at my leg where my injury was healing up pretty well.
"Echo, I need to talk to you about something.." When she spoke her voice came to me as concerned but also held a certain amount of care in it. My confused expression was enough of a response for her so she continued.
"I know you want to get to the surface but that's suicide.. why don't you stay here with Mel, Sam, and I?" She asked me with a bit of a pleading look in her eyes.
I blinked, snapping out of my little trance, before I shook my head.
"Focus, I can't.. I promised Mira I would accompany her to the surface even if that meant dying on the way. Can you imagine? The two of us actually making it to the surface? How amazing would that be? I'd get to see the sun, the trees, the cars, and the buildings. Sure things would be hard at first but we'd be together and that's all that matters." I explained with an apologetic smile.
At first Focus seemed disappointed with my words before she narrowed her eyes at me, reaching out to place her hand against my chest just briefly.
She felt the racing of my heart and then grinned up at me.

"I get it now.." She trailed off before suddenly she lunged at me and started poking at my sides playfully. I let out a yelp of surprise before I started giggling and laughing helplessly. Focus did this for only a few seconds though before she drew back beaming just as brightly as I had been when she first walked in.
"I'm gonna tell the others" She whispered excitedly before flying out of the room, leaving me with my bed in a mess and my face flushed.
I sat back up slowly with a glance around the room.
Was all of this really happening? Or was I going to wake up and find that all of this had just been some kind of cruel dream my mind invented to torture me.. I hoped it was the former rather than the latter.

I couldn’t help the spinning of my head as the words slowly sunk in. She repeated them in the same manner of sincerity. I can’t help but smile as I replay the words quietly in my mind. I pull myself around the bed, the smile bright on my lips. I can’t keep the smile in as I kneel, picking up the backpack. I get up with a grunt. It takes me a moment to get up from the position I had been in, and I have to use the bed, but I make it up to see that Echo has been watching me.

“I’ll be back” I give her a smile in return for hers before turning and escaping out into the cool hallway. I stop a few feet out, looking around at the walls. So much had happened in the day that we had been here. I feel the cool against my skin as I start walking again.

It doesn’t take me long to make it to the bathroom. It’s just as I had left it the day before. I reach blindly for the light switch, unsure exactly where it is. My hand presses against the wall until I find the small button, pushing it quietly. I press my eyes closed as the harsh lighting spills out of the room and into the hallway. I let my eyes open a little bit, trying to get used to the brightness. After a moment I step into the room, closing the door and locking it behind me.

I stand quietly in front of the sink for a moment, looking at myself in the mirror. I still looked bad. I had blood on my nose, dirt on my face, and the burn made the right side of my face a bright pink. It wasn’t a bad burn now that I looked at it. It was the kind of burn you got when you touched a hot pan and your mom put mustard on it to take the heat out. It was nothing major; it was just a silent reminder of a dead man’s fall from power.

I walk over to the small paper towel dispenser, unrolling a bit of it before ripping it off. I made my way back to the sink, turning on the cold water once more. I looked down at the faucet as the water ran into the drain. I knew it would be cold, but the shock of it on my hand as I place it under the rush of water made chills crawl up my arms. I wet the paper towel, hurrying to get my hand out from under the chill. I would sure wake someone up from a sleep if you were to pour it on them.

I pull my hand away, turning off the tap. I ring out the paper towel, looking at it for a moment. There was nothing special about the towel. It was a brown bit of paper that was now wet. I lean forward, getting closer to the mirror as I start to get the dirt and grime off my face.

After about five minutes of cleaning, my face looks new again. My skin seems to glow under the bright lights. I stand there, just looking at myself for a moment. I was much different now than I was when I first met Echo. You could see that I had aged in my face a little. It wasn’t a bad thing really. It was a sign that showed how much crap I had been through. The circles under my eyes told me that I was still tired, and the rest of my body felt as my eyes portrayed. I took in a slow breath, turning around so I can lift the dress off of my head. It takes me a moment to wriggle out of it before it falls to the ground to be forgotten. There was no point in keeping it since it had been ripped and torn on multiple occasions.

Next I pull of the red stained body slip that I word underneath. It too had a rip in it and was of no use. Now I stand there, half naked, looking at myself again in the mirror. I needed to get the blood off me. There with a thick bit of padding where I had been patched up earlier, but there was blood all over me. I get a new towel, wetting it silently. I pull it against my skin and it causes me to shriek quietly at the cold. I grit my teeth and bear it, wiping off the blood that had easily smeared around my stomach. Hell, I wasn’t even sure how much of the blood on me was mine.

Once I am clean, I am careful putting the clothing on. I don’t want to rip or stain or dirty up any of it. I am fast putting it on, but I take care as well. The dress fit me perfectly. It hugged my curves well and was easy to move around in. I smiled, looking at it. It was a shame that soon it would be stained with blood and dirt. I didn’t think there was any way around it really. The killing had to happen no matter what you were wearing.

I take in a slow breath. There was only one thing left that I needed to do while I was in the bathroom. I pull my bag closer to me on the counter, messing with the large pocket until I come out with a hairbrush. I had lost my hat long ago and now my hair was a matted mess. I sigh quietly, running the brush slowly through it. I wasn’t tender headed by any means, but I would have rather not ripped all my hair out. Once I’m done I pull my hair around so it hangs over one shoulder. I looked much better now. There wasn’t anything really that would seem particularly wrong.

I turn, pulling my backpack on my back. With a silent flick of the light switch, I start back down the hallway. I felt like I was walking faster, but maybe that’s just because I felt cleaner and more refreshed. I can’t keep the smile off my lips as I step into the doorway, standing in silence.

“So, what do you think?”

I was just sat there in my bubble of happiness wondering what was going to happen to ruin everything. Something had to happen didn't it? It was a law in Rapture. You can never be happy for too long down here. Not anymore. But I just couldn't see how anything could happen that would ruin the happiness I felt now.
We were still safe within the confines of the facility, our enemy had been killed in the battle so we were no longer hunted, and no-one had died during the fighting. Everyone was still here albeit a little bit scuffed up, they were all alive. That was all that mattered.
Not only that but I had found out that I was not only capable of loving but I was also capable of being loved by someone else.
That feeling alone was ten times better than anything I had ever experienced before in my life.

Again I found myself repeating the words that Mira had whispered into my ear only minutes ago. Her soft whisper was like an echo in the halls, whispering over and over again that she loved me. The sincerity in her voice.. she couldn't have been lying. There was simply no way. She truly did love me just as I loved her.
The joyous smile came back to my lips as I just let myself revel in my emotions. All of my dreams had come true thanks to one woman. One woman who, when I first met her, neither trusted me nor liked me in the slightest. In fact there had been a moment where she considered killing me.
Those times were over now. Things were different now.

A voice at the door drew me out of my thoughts and I blinked, turning my head towards the sound. What I found myself looking up at was one of the most beautiful women ever to set foot in the city of Rapture or at least that was what I thought the moment I set eyes upon Mira in her new dress. She had taken the time to clean her face of the mood and blood as well as taken the care to brush her hair with the brush I remembered her having brought with her from the apartment that seemed to be a million miles away now.
I was speechless for a good thirty seconds before I managed to shake myself out of my little trance.

I pulled myself up from where I had been sat on my bed and approached her with a small smile on my lips. My eyes were filled with a mixture of admiration and excitement. Admiration because once again I found myself looking at a woman who was just..ravishing and excitement because the dress she wore fit her perfectly. Which made the small trek I made to get the dress all the more worth it despite how bad of an idea it had been at the time.
"Wow... You look fantastic. Absolutely fantastic, Mira!" I bubbled with a giggle and a grin.
It was the absolute truth as well.

I stood in front of her for a second or two before reaching out with my hands, taking hers with mine. There was only a second of hesitation before I closed the distance between us and pressed my lips against hers just lightly. Perhaps I was taking too much advantage of my new-found privilege but it was just a child playing with a new toy. Every touch, sensation, and feeling was new and wonderful for me.
Having never kissed before though I wasn't quite sure how I was supposed to place my lips or how hard I was supposed to press them to hers, so I found myself staying on the soft side.
Slowly I pulled away with a flush on my cheeks.
"I'm sorry.. I'm probably lousy at that.." I murmured apologetically.

I watched her those few moments before I spoke. Even without me in the room she was smiling. It was good that I wasn’t the only thing that could make her smile. I wanted her to keep smiling long after I was gone. If I didn’t make it to the surface with her, I wanted to know that she would keep smiling. I just wanted her to be happy. I would have loved it if we were able to stay together forever, but in the end, her happiness is what mattered. I wanted to be selfish, but at the same time I knew that it was better if I didn’t.

I spoke and she looked up to me. I tried to make myself look as flattering as possible as I stood in the doorway. I knew that the uneven skin color of my face might make me look a little less appealing, but she would have to deal with it. I wasn’t too worried about it. It would clear up in a day or two and I would be right as rain.

There’s a mixture of feelings in her eyes as she watched me. In her silence she pulled herself off the bed, walking quietly towards me in the doorway. There was a mix of emotions in her eyes as she looked me over and I couldn’t help but flush knowing that she was enjoying what she saw. She giggled and I couldn’t help but giggle as well. I was so glad that she liked it. I shook my head though, the smile still on my lips.

“Don’t flatter me, Dollface. I do love it though” I am beaming as I speak, taking a few steps forward to meet her. She grabs my hands and I smile at her. I’m surprised again to find her lips on mine. I can’t help my eyes from closing, my body leaning in for her. By the time I realized that she had pulled away, I had already begun leaning in to meet nothing. I pull myself back, feeling the flush grow on my cheeks.

She thought she was bad at kissing. I can’t help but shake my head. Yes, she was new to this, but new and bad were two different things. I pull my hands from hers, letting them come to settle on her hips. I sigh quietly, watching her a moment. I felt like a fool for having leaned in like I did. It wasn’t me to want more of someone than they wanted to give. I just wanted to be near her, I wanted to feel her touch.

“New and lousy are two different things. Just enjoy it, hm?” I smile to her, placing my lips on hers for a second before curling my arm around her back and pulling her towards the bed. We both really should still be resting. I knew that it probably wouldn’t happen, but I wanted her lying down. Then maybe I could feel a little more at ease. I wanted her to rest, but I wasn’t sure if she would.

“Come lay down” I lean in, whispering the words quietly in her ear. I wanted her to get rest. It had probably been a mistake to go and change. Now we had something to talk about and to giggle over like little school girls like we seemed to be doing much of.

I make it to the bed with her and I let go of her for a moment so I could pull the cover back on the bed. I pat the soft top with my hand, trying to usher her into it’s warmth.

(Sorry about the wait. I accidentally took a nap)

How could one describe the sensation that came with knowing someone liked something you gave them? It was very difficult. My mind could not quite understand the emotions that were flowing through me. There was a sense of pride that came with seeing her in the dress that I had gotten her, a sense of happiness that she loved the dress as much as she did, but also this sense of admiration that came with how amazing she looked in the dress. Once again I found myself admiring the curves that Mira had to offer.
She was practically the complete opposite of me in that sense. During my time in the facility my mind seemed to always envy the other girls who had more curves. I felt like my body wasn't growing the way it was supposed to..and even now that it had more or less finished growing, I felt as though I was not nearly feminine enough for Mira's tastes.

When we kissed it seemed like we were both taken away by the sensations the kiss brought into both of us. In fact the whole motion seemed to be new for the both of us, in a way, more for me than her but that went without saying. The difference was that she had probably not been kissed in a very very long time as opposed to my never having been kissed before.
Which was really the origin of my fear of not kissing well enough for her liking. It was an irrational fear all things considered but it was still there at the back of my mind whenever I leaned in to grace my lips with the feeling of hers.

Quickly though she put my fears to rest by telling me that there was a difference between being new at something and being lousy at something. Immediately a smile came to my lips and I nodded my head slightly to accept her explanation. She was absolutely right. Why should I worry about my ability to kiss when instead I could just enjoy the sensation?
As if to prove her point she leaned in to kiss me again, only briefly, before she wrapped her arm around me and started to guide me towards our beds. At first I was a little bit confused but then I realized that she wanted me to lay down.
Again she was right. Really neither of us were supposed to be up and about with the extent of our injuries. Despite the fact that we were both able to get around without too much pain on either of our accounts.

So I followed along with her towards my bed and I allowed myself to be guided into the covers by her movements. Once I was laid down I curled up a little bit and watched her from where I was laid on the bed. I knew that she was taking care of me though really she was the one who was the most severely injured out of the two of us.
I closed my eyes for just a moment to take in the comfort of my bed before they opened again to look back up at my companion.
"You should rest too, Mira.. we both need as much rest as we can get." I said quietly as I wrapped my arms around myself and hugged myself tightly. It was more to keep my hands busy than anything else.
Otherwise they would have reached out to grab her so I could drag her into my bed with me.

Slowly I turned my head into the pillow, breathing in the warm air, before I mustered up the courage to look back over at my companion again.
"Thank you for showing me what falling in love feels like.. I've never been so happy in my entire life." I said to her without so much as a falter in my voice. Nothing but sincerity could be found in my tone and the sheepish smile that followed only added to the truth behind the words I spoke.
I truly did believe that she had changed my life for the better and shown me what it was like to be human.


(You'll have to excuse any sloppiness in my post, our new years celebrations have started a little early)

I took it easy on guiding her quietly to her bed. If I didn’t, there was a great risk that I could open up the place on my side that was giving me trouble. Normally it wouldn’t have been a big deal to me, but I really didn’t want to spend any more time healing than I already had to. For that I was very cautious, guiding her quietly with my hand securely around her body. It was nice to feel her underneath my hand. I liked the way that I could feel her moving and I knew that she wasn’t just going to disappear into nothingness.

She doesn’t fight me as I pull her across the room to her bed. She doesn’t fight me when I motion for her to lie down. I smile, glad that she doesn’t. I just wanted her to rest and to keep herself healthy. I grin at her as she tells me I should be resting. I would rest when I was done tending to her. She should have known that I wasn’t just going to jump into bed and fall asleep no matter how tired I was. I would take care to make sure that she was comfortable and preferably asleep before I climbed in my own bed to rest for a while. I would probably just nap anyway. I wasn’t sure if I would be able to sleep anymore after the night before’s rest. I had slept much longer than I had intended then.

I smile quietly at her words. She was thanking me for something that I really had no control of. I wasn’t showing her what love was, I had simply fallen into an emotional state of bliss with someone that had never been loved before. It was a very simple thing to see. I giggle quietly at my stupidity. My head was still spinning about the kissing and the dress and everything else that had gone on since I had woken up.

“Well you can be happy all you like, but…” I trail off quietly, the smile very apparent on my lips as I speak. Before I go to my own bed, I sit on the side of hers, pulling my backpack off my back. I am silent as I pull the strings apart, looking inside. I scoot towards the bedside table, starting to pull things out. I pull out a cola, a water bottle, a can a fruit, and a back of potted meat. There was a little bit more in my bag, but our rations would have to be spread out. I turn towards around slightly so I can watch her.

“You need to eat first” I smile quietly, picking up the canned fruit and opening it quietly. I set the can down, licking the sweet flavor off my fingers. I continue on, opening the potted meat as well. It wasn’t a gourmet meal, but it was something to get in her stomach. I was worried enough that she might not be eating enough as it was. Yes, we hadn’t eaten in a while and we both needed it, but I could wait. I smile quietly, pointing to everything on the table. “Pick your poison, Doll” I smirk quietly at her. Really, I was going to try to get her to eat as much as possible. I wasn’t sure how much that was exactly, but before she had said she ‘hungered’ for something. I was still very curious about that. I wanted to know bad what she had meant by it.

“I will not be taking no for an answer either” I smile quietly, bringing my legs up on the edge of the bed, folding them quietly. I would eat what she did not pick up. I would let her decide exactly what she chose. I would not push her. This was all her decision.

(Well, go enjoy New Years! There is always tomorrow. Go have your celebrations. Celebrate for the both of us!)

I was very happy to see Mira climb into her bed after she was sure that I had laid down in mine. Although my wellbeing was important, hers was too and I was glad that she knew that her body needed rest as much as mine did.
Suddenly, instead of laying down the way I was laid down, she pulled her bag from her back and started to go through it to find some of the supplies she had collected from her old apartment.
I watched carefully as she laid the things out on the bedside table next to me as if she expected me to eat. I blinked, looking over the different objects, before I reached out to take a pep bar from the small pile. My fingers opened the wrapper but I did not take a bite out of it for at least a minute.
There was an expression of both sadness and uncertainty on my face.

"That's not the kind of hunger I was talking about.." I whispered softly as I glanced down at my hands that were now pressed against my chest. I suppose it was something I had never really considered telling her about out of pure shame. I was ashamed of this part of me that only ever came out once every couple months.
I parted my lips to speak but I found that I could not tell her about the hunger I had been referring to. No, that hunger was not something I expected someone like her to understand. Not only that but my mind was convinced that she would think less of me if I told her the truth. Who would want to be together with a creature with a hunger for..Adam? Sure all of Rapture operated on Adam but for me to feel a hunger for it.. How could I admit such a thing to her?

Suddenly I was speaking and my mind was blank. I was talking without truly thinking through my words or the consequences that came with my words. I didn't think about the possibility of Mira losing her feelings towards me or perhaps changing her opinion about me. All I thought about was being completely truthful to her so that she wouldn't find herself surprised in the future if the urge hit me heavily while we were together.
"When I was taken in for the Big Sister program they did everything they could to get that..slug..out of me. They only partially succeeded though and ever since I have had to fight this hunger that grows deep inside me. A never-ending hunger for Adam.." I closed my eyes as the confession passed my lips.
I didn't want to see the look of disgust or disapproval that would have come to rest on her face.

It was not something that I could help though. Nor was it an urge that I could deny without torturing myself. I was a Big Sister but being a Big Sister meant also having been a Little Sister at some point which meant having been drawn towards the scent, smell, and energy that came with the consumption of Adam fresh from the source.
Although the scientists in this facility had been successful in removing most of the creature that lived within me while I was a Little Sister, there was no way of fully removing the thing.
For the rest of my life I was going to find myself craving the glowing red liquid no matter what.
I was not even sure if such a craving could be broken.
"I'm..so ashamed.." I whispered as I tried to hide my face from the woman beside me.


(Oh no! It's a family thing so all there is to do is go between talking to them and coming here to reply. Really, I'd much rather sit here replying to this than stand there awkwardly talking about things I hardly know anything about..
Are you not celebrating? :\)

I slowly began putting little bits of fruit in my mouth. One at a time I pulled the bits from the can, popping them into my mouth. I watch her as she grabs a pep bar, pulling the wrapper down from the bar with slow fingers. She looks at the food as if it’s unappetizing to her. Mid chew, I stop, watching her silently. Something was worrying her greatly. I knew very well that I wanted to know. I knew that if I didn’t see what the matter was, it would bother me the rest of the day.

I’m just about to ask her what’s wrong when she speaks, her words quiet and cool in the silence of the room. They seem very loud even though she only whispers. I watch her in silence, shifting myself to I can get a better look at her. There is a pain on her face. I can feel it just as much as I can see it. Her eyes fall to the bed beneath her and I want to know so badly why she was acting this way all of a sudden. Was it something I said? Something I did? I didn’t know how to react, so we sit in silence.

I don’t say anything for the longest time until she starts talking. Then, instead of speaking, I look up, watching her face quietly as it shifts and changes. Her words give me chills as I watch her. She was very shamed and I could tell by the way she closed her eyes she thought this would change something between us. I look down to the bed a moment before licking the last bit of sugary juice off my fingers, placing the can on the table. I watch her a moment before pulling myself up off the bed, and changing places. I walk around the bed, making it to hers. I take a seat quietly in the area with the most space. After a moment, I lie down, letting the silence sink in quietly.

“Y-You know how I left a few days ago to go to the bathroom? You know how I got up, walked out with my pack, and you found me screaming in the hallway?” I pause a moment, letting my hand trace across the back of her hand a moment. “I didn’t go to the bathroom… Since I met you things had been different. We were either resting or moving along. I-I didn’t want you to see me.” I stop a moment. I wasn’t sure if I was going about this the right way at all. I wasn’t sure if I should tell her. Stop. I was going to tell her because she had confided in me. She thought she was a monster. If she was a monster then I was probably double that. She hadn’t done that to herself; I had.

“I went to get a...fix really. I need Adam just like every splicer does, Echo.” I raise up my arm, tracing the small scab where I had stuck the Adam needle. I trace it quietly with my finger a minute. “I was surprised that you didn’t notice…That night, my arms were glowing like fireflies.” I sigh a moment. I wasn’t doing this right. I wasn’t doing any of this right. “I crave Adam. I-I thought that maybe once I got to the surface I could break it for you. Since there was no supply of it you know…” I take in a short breath, pulling myself a little closer to her. “I-You’re not a monster. I’m the monster, Echo. Unlike you I had a choice. I chose to get the plasmids. I accepted them to protect myself. I knew that I would have this crave for Adam. You though…You didn’t know. You were just a scared girl who was put on a table and poked and prodded until…” I sigh quietly, shaking my head. “Don’t be ashamed” I speak quietly. I was starting to lose my voice. The mood had just changed from happy and giddy to sour and sad in a matter of seconds. I hadn’t meant to. I grit my teeth. Curiosity killed the cat.


(Nope. No celebration for me. I don't really have much of a life. My New Years consisted of watching my elder sister play Assassin's Creed 3. Now though, I must go for the night. It's a tradition that everyone goes to bed at midnight. Really my mom just wants peace and quiet. I convinced her to let me stay up and post this last bit. I'm sorry it's short. I was trying to hurry for you. I hope you enjoy the rest of your New Year's (Have a happy one by the way) Even if you're with your family, celebrate for the both of us.haha)

How could I not be ashamed about the addiction that had been forced upon me by the scientists who had experimented on me until they came up with the very first Big Sister. In fact in creating me as the first Big Sister, they had created the very first being that was not only addicted to Adam but was also able to find it with ease.
Although the lust for the glowing red liquid had diminished over the years, the hunger was still there in the back of my mind slowly eating away at me. With my maturing from Little Sister to Big Sister I lost my ability to tell bodies with Adam from bodies without the substance but the hunger was still there.
Often that was the reward that came with protecting the Little Sister's from damage as they harvested the Adam from corpses. We usually received a certain amount from the Little ones as a reward for having kept them safe.

I was expecting Mira to look at me with disgust or distaste for the truth behind that part of me. It was a part that I had no control over whatsoever. No matter what I did, the urge to consume Adam remained in my system.
But in her eyes I saw something very different, I saw some kind of acceptance to the words that passed my lips. Like she knew exactly what I was going through and what it felt like to constantly lust after the glowing red substance that ran the whole city as a whole.
In fact when I admitted to having a deep addiction to Adam that I could not fight, she seemed almost relieved in the strangest of senses.
She stood from where she had been sad only to move around her bed to mine, sitting down on the edge of my bed. Only a second later I found myself face to face with the laid out figure of the woman I loved, who regarded me with a look of acceptance. Of all the things I had expected to see in her gaze the very last thing had been acceptance.
How could she accept me when such a thing had come to light? Even though the love between us was true, how could she keep the same emotions for me once she found out my secret?
However with my admission came an admission from her. She drew herself close to me and I looked into her eyes deeply as I listened to every word that passed her lips.

I watched her with an expression of confusion as she began to explain to me the kind of urges she had herself. At first there seemed to be very little connection between the two but then she started to describe the addiction and I understood exactly what she meant.
The night before, when she had slipped away under the pretense of going to the bathroom, she had actually gone to fulfill her lust for Adam.
Really, how could I blame her for being addicted to the stuff? It was simply a way of life down here. Something that everyone, even me as a Big Sister, needed to come to terms with.
"I didn't know.. I wish I had known.. You wouldn't have had to go out of your way.." I whispered softly in response to her words.

Both of my hands found their way up to her cheeks and I let them rest there for a few seconds, just staring into her eyes. I kept my gaze on hers until my eyes came to close slowly, the very first signs of tears forming in the corner of my eyes. I tried my very best to keep those tears from falling.
I knew how much she hated to see me cry.
"You're not a monster, Mira..you're the most amazing, beautiful, and wonderful person I've ever met. You're the one who taught me what it was like to be human and for that I could never thank you enough.. Not even with how much I love you." I whispered the last words with a smile before I leaned in to press a soft kiss to her lips, keeping them there for a second or two before my hands drew her even closer to me, the kiss becoming a mixture of emotional and needing.
I wanted her to know just how much I needed her in order to go on with our journey. Without her my life was impossible.

"Next time though..tell me, okay? Promise me that you'll tell me the next time you get the urge so that you can get Adam from my reserves. Big Sister Adam is much more pure than that you can find on the streets. It's so much more safe.. I want to keep you safe, love." I whispered to her softly as I drew away from the kiss only for a few moments.
Although I had thought this whole thing was going to be a confession on my side of things, it turned to a confession on her side as well. I suppose that equaled out to a perfect balance.
A smile came to my lips as I regarded her with an expression of complete love and admiration. If anything everything had made our relationship all the more concrete.


(Aww that such a shame! Well, I'll do what I can to celebrate for the both of us but I'm pretty exhausted so god only knows how long the drinks are going to keep me up. I hope you rest well and I look forward to seeing you in the morning, once you've rested enough. )

She expected me to turn away from her. She thought I would turn and walk away because of something that almost everyone in Rapture dealt with. If there was someone in Rapture that didn’t worry about Adam every day of their lives I wanted to see them. To some it was a drug that could give them the best high of their lives. To others, it was annoying tick that they needed to get rid of. For people like me and Echo, it was an act of self-preservation. It was something that most people didn’t think of. That tick was your mind telling you that you needed something because if you didn’t you would deteriorate until you were nothing more than skin and bones. So really, all of us were acting in that manner, but I didn’t enjoy the high because I wanted to. I enjoyed it because there was nothing else to do while you sat there, trying to convince yourself that you were normal. None of us were normal. It would take a lot for any of us to realize that.

I take in a slow breath. She says that she wished she had known. I sigh quietly, closing my eyes for a moment. I take in the slow breathing beside me. I don’t know what to say as she sits there in silence for a while. Then she speaks and I don’t have to come up with anything to say. She surprises me with another kiss, grabbing me and pulling me closer to her. I wasn’t sure why her kisses still surprised me. I would have thought that I would be getting used to them by now. For the moments that our lips touch, I close my eyes and relax. She didn’t care about my Adam problem like I thought she would have. Maybe that’s because we shared the same problem together.

She pulls away quietly, looking me in the eyes. She…She wanted to give me some of her Adam next time? I take in a slow breath, shaking my head. I wasn’t a bum and I would not accept any more donations from her. I pull myself away from her, sitting up a moment.

“I won’t take your Adam” My voice is quite harsh in the silence of the room. For a while I don’t think that I can stand looking at her. I don’t want to deny her the Adam, but if I didn’t, then what would become of me? Taking her Adam was taking her memories no matter how ‘pure’ it was. I take I a slow breath, looking over to her. “You’ve given me so much. I won’t take anything else from you. I’ll find my own Adam and you keep yours” I give her a smile that I know doesn’t reach my eyes. I try though, knowing that one of these days I’m just going to end up not being able to smile. Right now, I needed to. I didn’t want her to think that I felt I was too good for her Adam. That wasn’t the case at all.

I lean in, pressing another light kiss to her lips before scooting a little closer and leaning my head in to rest on her shoulder. I kiss it a moment before closing my eyes, a quietly sigh on my lips.

“I think we should just get some sleep, hm?” I just wanted to drop the subject really. I wasn’t going to take her Adam and I didn’t want to give her the chance to try and persuade me. This was probably the one thing that no meant no for. I wasn’t going to give her a chance to try to sway that in any way.

(I hope you enjoyed New Years! I’m on babysitting duty while all the parents come over and drink. My replies might be a little sparse and if I get to reply, they may be short. One of my cousins things it’s funny to get my mom’s blown glass orbs and throw them across the living room T_T )

Unlike many of the inhabitants who remained in the ruined streets of Rapture, I was not addicted to Adam because of the high that came with consuming it. I was not addicted to the glowing red liquid because of the rush of power that came with it. I was addicted to Adam because of a past life that had ruined any hopes of my being normal.
I was being punished with something in my life that had been chosen for me. Never in a million years would I have chosen to become a Little Sister nor would I have agreed to join the Big Sister program but both things happened all the same whether I wanted them to or not.
My life had been ruined from the very beginning and there was nothing I could do about it now.

I suppose that was often the hardest thing to accept about myself. The fact that I was never really going to be 'normal' no matter what I did. When Mira and I got to the surface I knew we were both going to be changed people. If the journey didn't change us, which it already has, then living in a whole new world was.
But even in this new world I was going to be stuck with the Adam addiction for the rest of my life. Perhaps I would be able to live a relatively normal life with friends and a family..but the hunger would always be there gnawing away at my mind.
Never quite satisfied but also never overpowering. Just a dull throbbing at the far reaches of my instincts.

Suddenly there was movement in front of me and I looked up to see what was going on. Mira sat up and looked down at me with an expression of almost..anger? Something that was a mixture of anger and something else. I felt my eyes widen and a look of vulnerability come to rest upon my face, almost a frightened expression caused by the sudden change in emotions.
She very firmly told me that she wasn't going to accept my Adam nor would she accept anything else from me for I had given her enough already.
I nodded my head slowly as I watched her, fearing I had done something terribly wrong.

Her expression softened just a little bit though and she leaned down to kiss me softly, a kiss that seemed to make things better. I sighed when she pulled away and closed my eyes, enjoying the warmth that came with her pressing closer to me. With a slight amount of hesitation that stemmed from the harsh tone she had used moments earlier, I moved one of my hands to her waist and gently pulled her closer to me.
I was careful to avoid her injured side as well as making sure I didn't draw her too close to me lest it put too much pressure on that side of her body.

I turned my head into her just a little bit to press a kiss to her ear before I whispered into it quietly so that only she could hear me.
"If that's what you want, fine. I'll do anything for you Mira. I'd tear this whole city to the ground if that's what you asked of me" There was not a hint of sarcasm in my voice or anything other than sincerity. I meant every word I whispered to her and then some. I only hoped that she knew I meant it all.
My mind made a promise to itself that I was going to do everything I could to make the woman I loved happy and I meant everything.
"Sleep sounds nice.." I added quietly before closing my eyes. I focused on the warmth of her body, the softness of her skin, and the silky feeling of her brushed hair against my face. I didn't want to move from here ever again.

(Well, my New Years was about as fun as New Years can get when you're stuck celebrating with family.. it wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be though so that's a good thing.
I hope the kids aren't too hard to handle! :\
Also, my replies will be really spaced out seeing as we're going to be driving most of today. I'm hoping to be back by 7 or 8 our time, so I hope to see you then!)

Maybe I was being too hard on her. Maybe the tone I took was too harsh. I saw something in her that made me stop and watch a moment. It was an emotion that I saw in my mother countless times. It was a mixture of fear and complete devotion. Was I really being that harsh? I had just wanted her to see that I didn’t want any more handouts. I didn’t want to be given everything. I wanted to support myself more than be supported. I take in a slow, deep breath, watching in silence for a few moments.

After a few seconds I lie there quietly, watching the cloth that was beneath my head. I felt bad—no I felt horrible for what I had done. I take in a slow breath as I hear her agree to sleep. Maybe that’s what I needed to clear my mind of all of these different things that I had been feeling.

“I’m sorry, Echo. Sleep well.” My words are quiet as I watch her a moment. Her eyes were closed now and I just watch. I can’t keep from admiring the look on her face and the smell of her. She is so close. I just want to lean in further to press myself to her. I keep myself from doing it though, knowing that I didn’t deserve it, not after the look she had just given me. Slow breaths fill my lungs and after a while of watching her, I close my eyes.

The moment I close my eyes dreams slowly begin to dance around in the darkness.

I’m at home. In the same room I’ve lived in for ten years now. I sit at the small make up station, applying the normal make up for a night in Rapture. I wouldn’t be going out with anyone. I would steal and take what I could. It was a very easy thing to do when you were young and beautiful. A deep voice can be heard out in the living room. It’s the voice of Andrew Ryan with another one of his public service announcements on the picturebox. He was talking about the great chain and why he created Rapture. Everything pulled itself into place.

I knew this dream…well I knew this memory. I was older than I seemed. I look in the mirror to see the girl that I had been. My face was young and my eyes were much more vibrant. A small scar was one of the many I had at the time. It danced itself down the side of my face. It wasn’t very noticeable, but I noticed it every time I looked in the mirror.

I had gotten up, just about to head for the door when I heard the it slam open. I stop, mid step, listening quietly for the sound of bottles shifting in the cabinet. He was home early and I wondered if it might have been someone else coming through the door. The sound of bottles doesn’t come. The door is thrown open; there is a very angry look on the man’s face as he walks in. He had dark hair and blue eyes that matched mine. You could smell the drink on him a mile away.

The man doesn’t speak, only doing the same routine of walking in; picking me up by my hair and dragging me out into the living room. I can’t put up much of a fight against the large man. I was never able to really defend myself. He throws me bitterly on the ground. He stares at me a moment before kneeling. There doesn’t seem to be anything close enough tonight, so he decides to use his fists. After a few shots to the stomach, I’m out of air. I kick, and beg like I always to, but he hears none of it. After a few minutes of causing me as much pain as he possibly could, he stopped, seeing the blood run down my nose.

“She’s dead you worthless wretch” I can see the look on his face. He’s debating whether or not he should continue beating me. I watch him another moment before he leans back, hitting me again. “She’s dead and it’s your fault.” Another blow, this time, causing me to hit my head on the hardwood floor beneath me. “Your mother is dead and you didn’t do anything to help her!” He is enraged and it seems that he’s decided to take his anger out on me. He hits me again and my eyes close, my vision had been starting to blur. Another hit causes me to open my eyes, but now, I’m not the girl on the floor. I was the one on top of the girl, beating her like she wasn’t anything. The girl was me for a few moments, until I blinked again, and the girl wasn’t me any longer. The girl beneath me morphed and changed. This wasn’t the same dream anymore.

The girl beneath me was Echo. I was beating the one girl that I had just confessed my love to only hours ago. The dream continued though, just as I remembered the memory. One more blow and tears filled her eyes. She was crying, more over the loss of her mother than over the feeling of me beating her senseless.

One more hard hit to her face throws me out of my sleep. My heart was racing, my breathing hard. I couldn’t see straight. Tears formed quickly in my eyes. I looked over, unable to even tell if Echo was awake next to me or not. I didn’t care right now. I had just had what I was considering the worst nightmare of my life. My breathing was labored as I threw myself off the bed. I was trying to be quiet, in case my sudden jolt hadn’t awoken Echo. I sat quietly on the floor, holding my knees to my chest like a child. I rocked back and forth, pushing my face into my knees. Just the prospect of being my father…It was something that had me sobbing. My mind was wicked and malicious apparently. Was I going mad? I didn’t feel these angry thoughts towards Echo. But…My worst memory had just… I take in a deep breath. I didn’t even want to think about it anymore. It hurt too much.


(Every time I got on to reply something happened and I got pulled away. Sorry.)

What was I afraid of? I wasn't really sure what I was afraid of in those seconds when Mira spoke harshly to me. Perhaps it was the fact that I saw anger in her eyes and that was an emotion I had never really seen in her eyes, especially not when I was the one involved.
As a Big Sister I had faced down just about everything that Rapture had to throw at me and never once truly felt fear. I suppose the real fear was not fear of Mira and what she could do to me, no that wasn't the kind of anger I saw in her eyes, it was the fear that I had done something to already ruin the relationship that had just started between us. A fear that I was going to lose her.

I didn't realize how tired I was until I closed my eyes and the moment I did that, I fell into a light doze that was not quite sleep but was not quite being awake either. I could have sworn that I heard Mira's voice in the distance but I wasn't sure whether the voice actually came from her or whether the voice was a part of a dream.
Either way I knew that she was wishing me good rest and I would have wished her the same had my mind not already been fading. Before long I was lost in a deep sleep and my mind faded into a wild dream the likes of which I had never experienced before.

---

I was walking through what looked to be an alleyway in the middle of the city. It was hard to tell where exactly but it looked to be somewhere in The Drop. There was nothing but silence in the darkness of the empty alley but the light at the end of it was very inviting. After a moment or two of walking I reached the light and found it to be a streetlight shining down onto the sidewalk.
With a glance left and right I found that the street in front of me was empty save for a single little girl walking along the street. She was walking slowly with each step having a kind of dance-like bounce to it.
As I approached her I found that she was singing a soft little tune that was more than familiar to me.

"Mr. Bubbles, Mr. Bubbles are you there? Are you there?
Come and bring me lollies, come and bring me toffees.
Teddy bears... Teddy bears..."
The voice was a mixture of tones and pitches that made a shiver run up along my spine as I walked alongside the child, watching as she balanced herself on the very edge of the sidewalk with her arms far out on either side of her. She continued to the end of the street until there was a corner and she had a choice on where to go next. It was then that the girl looked over her shoulder.
"C'mon Mr. B! Don't make me carry you.."
As soon as the words passed her lips there came a long groan from behind her and the hulking shape of a Big Daddy appeared from the darkness.

I stepped aside as the pair joined together and the little one dragged her protector along with her across the street, leading him towards a vent entrance that could be seen only a few yards away. As soon as they reached the vent there was a sudden rush of motion as a Splicer appeared from the darkness.
He made a move towards the Sister but the Big Daddy was quick to step in, pushing the man back with enough force to break ribs, letting out a loud warning groan.
Before the protector could react though he was hit by a sudden blast of fire from behind and he let out a groan of rage, his visor turning an angry shade of red. The sound of his drill revving up filled the air but when he turned to defend himself a blast of lighting came from the other side, stunning him where he was.
In the second he was stunned a group of at least five Splicers appeared out of the darkness and jumped on top of the Daddy, pounding him with everything they had.
As powerful as the iron protector was, he was no match for the pure number of enemies that surrounded him. Soon his movements began to slow and after one final blast of fire his body slumped down into a heap on the ground.

Suddenly my point of view changed and I was looking up at the whole scene that was happening in front of me.
As soon as the Big Daddy fell I found myself running towards the fallen protector, trying desperately to get to his side. Once there I grabbed onto his huge hand and tugged on it, trying to get him back up. Tears were streaming down my cheeks. He was only asleep right? He was just resting so he could get back up!
I parted my lips to scream.

---

"Daddy!" I was awoken by the sound of my own voice only to find that I was alone in bed. My eyes flew open, glancing desperately around the room, my heart racing in my chest, my breathing quick and short, but then I realized that the whole thing had been just a dream.
I wasn't there anymore. That wasn't the life that I was forced to live anymore.
But the dream was so vivid I could have sworn that it was a memory as opposed to an actual dream.

Suddenly it dawned on me that I was alone in bed and I quickly started to look around the room to find Mira. When I spotted her, curled in a ball on the ground, I practically jumped out of bed and crouched down next to her, wrapping my arms around her.
I wasn't sure what happened or why she was on the ground with her face buried in her knees but I knew that she needed me to be there for her. So I just sat there with her tightly holding her to me, careful to keep away from her side all while trying to do whatever I could to comfort her.
"It's alright Mira, it's alright.." I murmured into her ear while gently running my fingers through her hair.

It was getting harder to breathe as I cried quietly into my knees. I hadn’t been this upset in a very long time and I could tell I was starting to freak out a little more than I should have. I needed to calm down and think. I kept telling myself that, but it never happened. I couldn’t stop the slow rocking of my body or the quiet, choking sobs that pulsed through me. I couldn’t stop my shaking. My mind was set on the picture of her face as she cried and begged for me to stop. Was that what I had looked like that night? So feeble and weak? I hoped that’s not what I had looked like, but I knew that I looked even worse.

I had been so weak back then. There was nothing I could do to stop that man from hurting me and my mother. Some nights I thought long and hard about just running off into Rapture, but I thought better of it. Then, father would have beaten mother even harder. He might have been the reason for her death had I left. So, each night he chose which one of us he would get pissed off at first. Most of the times he got mad at me. Most of the times I didn’t respond to his questions fast enough or he thought I was wearing too much make up to go out. Most of the time mother had to defend me. Most of the times we both got beaten.

The sound of a word, shouting from above me makes me jump, but I don’t move. I hope that maybe, Echo would fall back asleep before she realizes that I’m not in her bed. I sit in silence, rocking back and forth. I hear the bed moving as I assume Echo begins to look around. Before I can even notice her move, her arms are around me, trying hard to comfort me. She runs her fingers through my hair. I could feel her catch on small knots, which meant I had probably been moving around quite a bit in my sleep.

I close my eyes, trying to stop the tears. I didn’t want her to see me like this. Hell, I didn’t want to be like this. I take in slow breaths before I feel myself move. My arms wrap tightly around her and I bring her closer to me than I ever have before. I don’t care about the twinge in my side. I just care about her. I press my face into her neck, trying to keep myself from making any sort of noise. I was pushing back sobs that wanted to come tumbling out of me. It takes me a moment before I slowly stop crying.

“I’m sorry” The words barely push past my lips. I take in another deep breath. My crying has come to a complete stop now. I force it to. She didn’t need to see me cry. I didn’t need her to pity me. “I’m sorry I woke you” My voice is a little bit stronger now. I take in a deep breath, trying hard to compose myself.

I pull away from her a little bit to look at her. I had been in my own little emotional bubble of chaos on the floor, but I was not deaf to the cry that escaped her lips too. I sigh to her. I was being very selfish right now. I should have thought of her before myself.

“We both seem to be having trouble with our dreams, huh?” I try to smile at her, hoping to lighten the mood. The more I was around this girl it seemed the more I showed her how weak I really was. I showed her exactly how human and how incredibly close to insanity she had caught me.

I had no idea what was going on. No idea why she was on the floor. No idea why she was rocking slowly back and forth. No idea why her body was shaking with silent sobs. I had absolutely no idea about anything but the one thing I did know was that she needed me to be there for her.
As proud as she was, and proud she most certainly was, she needed me to hold and comfort her in a way that only someone who loved her could.
Despite the fact that my embrace didn't seem to do much to ease her pain, I wasn't willing to let go of her until the sadness had passed. It was too much for me to see her in the state she was in.
How could I stand to see her such pain?

We both just sat there quietly for what felt like the longest of times before her voice broke the silence, causing my eyes to open. Not that I could see anything through the darkness of the room and her hair in my face. Just the sound of her voice was comforting to me though so I listened to every word she had to offer, hanging on her voice.
She apologized for having woken me up and I quickly shook my head.
"You didn't wake me up.. I woke myself up." I whispered to her with a moment of hesitation.
Had she heard me? There was no way she hadn't.
If my voice had been loud enough to wake me up, it would have been more than loud enough for her to hear.

There was another pause before the figure I was holding lifted her head, turning it to look at me with an attempt at a smile. I could tell from the streaks on her cheeks that she had been crying but the tears were no longer falling.
As she spoke of having trouble with our dreams I nodded my head, bringing one of my hands around so I could brush the tears off her cheeks. I said nothing of the fact that she was crying though.
She had seen enough tears from me over the last few days I almost felt like I was being too emotional.
Though all things considered she was the more stable of the two of us.
Her dream must have been one hell of a nightmare for it to have upset her enough to make her cry.
I knew that if she was going to tell me about her dream, she would do so in her own time of her own accord. It was not my place to ask about such a thing.

Unlike her though I was much more loose lipped and I practically had to keep myself from telling her about my dream right then and there. Although it was much harder for me to avoid the subject seeing as she had heard the word I cried out upon waking up.
"Too much trouble.." I murmured while glancing around the room with a quiet sigh.
"It's this place. There are too many memories here." I added before I leaned my head forward so that our foreheads came together lightly.
I wasn't sure why I found the feeling of her forehead against mine to be as comforting as it was. Perhaps it had something to do with being close to her in body as well in mind but then again it could have been something completely different as well.

A couple seconds of silence passed before I dared to speak again, opening my eyes only briefly to look at the face of the woman I loved so much. The woman I was willing to give my life for and so much more if I could.
"I just want to get out of here.. I don't want to be here anymore. I just want to get to the surface with you, Mira. " I whispered quietly in a voice that I knew only she was going to hear.
Once we got to the surface it wasn't like things were going to magically disappear and life was going to be perfect at the flip of a switch..but getting there would be the start to new lives for the both of us. Lives where we would fight to earn a living as opposed to fighting for our very lives.

(Sadly I have to be up in about.. 4 hours to catch a flight back to college. I'll try to reply before I leave but I can't promise anything. If my plane gets in on time and everything like that, I should be back between 3 and 4 your time.)

(There's a chance I won't be able to reply again tonight. if I get a chance to reply don't worry about replying since you've got to be up early. Hope you traveling goes well!)

The more I thought about it, the more I realized how much this place had changed me. How different would I have been had my family stayed on the surface? Would I have all these scars from my father? Would my mother be dead? Would I have gotten a real, legitimate education? I knew that I wouldn’t have been so bitter or untrusting towards anything that moved. Maybe I would have gone to a normal high school and met normal people and had a very normal life. At this point, normal was oh so out of the question. The closest thing I had to a normal life was up there on the surface, and it hadn’t even begun yet. I wouldn’t have met Echo though…But what it she had been up on the surface? What if we had gone to the same school? The likelihood of that having happened wasn’t great, but the idea of it made me smile even wider. What if we were normal?

I sit there quietly, thinking over the apologies that crossed my lips. I knew that she had woken herself up, but I felt like it could have been partially my fault. I wasn’t sure why but I felt like I had something to do with her waking up, even though it seemed she had her own dream that woke her up only a few minutes after me. I wanted to say it was the loss of warmth and the loss of me in the bed that caused her to have whatever dream had troubled her out of sleep, but that was just me being hopeful again. She reminded me quietly that it wasn’t my fault, but I kept silent, just thinking over everything that had happened.

I had to say, we had come a long way from that first night. That first night I had saved her from a splicer, but only for the opportunity to kill her myself. I could remember it all so vividly. I had expected this Sister to put up a grand fight. Instead, she was backing slowly away from the splicer that threatened her life. I had killed the splicer, but something in me just didn’t want to kill the Sister. I just hadn’t tried. I remember telling her to go protect the Little girls. I sigh quietly, feeling my hand reach up to brush through her hair. We were the odd combination, to say the least.

She was speaking about the memories that were here. I nod quietly, taking in slow breaths. I was starting to calm down more. I wasn’t on the verge of hyperventilating and I wasn’t crying. Both of these signs were a good sign. I could agree with her. Rapture in general held an incredible amount of memories for the both of us that we could not just push away. I remembered telling myself that I was leaving the past behind when we left the apartment. I can’t keep the choked laugh to myself. It seemed we both were having problems with our past.

“When do you want to leave then? We can leave right now if that’s what you want.” Before I can think really, the words flow from my lips. I was sure that moving to a new place wouldn’t stop my dreams, but it could help ease her. I had seen enough pain in this place to last a lifetime. I took in a slow breath, pulling away from her further so I could get up. I hold out a hand, helping her up silently. I pull her by the waist back on the bed that we were right beside, letting my lips fall to her forehead for a moment.

“You tell me when you want to leave and I’ll follow you willingly.” I smile quietly. I was still trying to get the images out of my mind, but I didn’t want to cry anymore. I didn’t want to cry in front of her. I tilt my head lightly, looking at her. I wasn’t sure if I had ever cried in front of her before. I remembered crying in her little grotto, but she never saw me. She slept quietly that night on the floor nearby. I shake my head; I didn’t think she had ever seen me cry. Tonight was a first for her. I doubted it would be the last.